Tag Archive: trust


Learning to Trust Your Psychic Abilities

Filed Under: Intuitive Development, Psychic Ability, Spirit Communication by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Learning to Trust Your Psychic Abilities


Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC, 2011. All rights reserved.  
All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I have had psychic abilities over the years and have been able to predict the future for myself and a very close friend about 80 percent of the time. I usually only read for myself and her.(She is psychic but can’t read for herself at times.) I have trouble reading for others as I doubt my abilities due to insecurity. I have often missed opportunities for myself because I did not trust my ability. How can I get more faith in myself and the Universe? I know Spirit tries to get through to guide me but I feel I block it. Do you have any advice for me on all of this?

Karan

Dear Karan:

Trust plays a huge role in psychic ability. The problem is that this is something of a Catch-22: you have to trust your intuition for it to give you reason to trust it!

When I was in training to become a Spiritualist minister, trust was the biggest stumbling block for most of the students. At the school I attended, two main specialties were taught: energy healing and mediumship. Out of a class of about 30 people, only two of us were there to focus on spirit communication; everyone else wanted to be a healer. We had to learn both skill sets as part of the program, and the healers suffered all sorts of anguish over this because being a medium involves tremendous pressure to perform. Instead of channeling intangible energy, we have to produce verifiable information.

The two of us who wanted to be mediums differed from the others mainly in this matter of trust. We had already had a number of amazing experiences of spirit communication, which had convinced us that spirit communication is possible and that we were personally capable of succeeding at it. The main challenge our instructors faced in teaching the healers how to bring through information from Spirit was getting them to relax, let go of their fear of being wrong, and trust whatever came through.

There are four main aspects to successfully accessing psychic information. First, you must get into the right state of consciousness. Second, you must set a clear intention. Third, you must trust whatever comes through. Finally, you must be adept at translating clairvoyant, clairaudient, and clairsentient impressions into the answers being sought.

Many new psychics struggle because they aren’t even aware of the first step of getting into the right state of consciousness. They think that they can just mentally ask a question and receive an answer. This is a bit like randomly dialing a phone number and asking whoever answers what you are hoping to find out: to receive reliable information, you have to ask the right source. This is where good training can prove invaluable. In fact, when I am careful to shift my state of consciousness and get into a high vibration before tuning in, I always receive answers, and they always prove valuable and reliable.

Once you know you’re tuned in and you’ve set a clear, high intention, you have to trust what you receive. I’m sure every medium has had the experience of relaying something that seemed totally off the wall, only to have that information prove to be incredibly powerful and accurate. Following is one of the first experiences that cemented for me how important it is to trust what we receive.

I was reading for a woman who was grieving for her departed husband, James. I brought through lots of information about how he had passed and such, but the surprise came when I reached out for James and the spirit who stepped forward and answered my questions ended with the following: “Tell her that Jack sent the butterfly.” This seemed so “off” that I almost didn’t relay that part to her. I could hear my instructors telling me to trust, however, so I went out on a limb, wrote it down, and sent the email reading off to her with a hope and a prayer.

In her letter back to me, she described how she broke down sobbing when she got to that line, for she was sure that I was indeed in contact with her departed husband. Though his name had been James, his friends and family had always called him Jack. On the day of his funeral, she was calling out to him in her heart and mind and staring out the window at the bleak November morning when a huge butterfly appeared and hovered just on the other side of the glass. She thought this very unusual for November, and she had been wondering if this was somehow the spirit of her departed husband trying to give her a sign. I was so glad that I decided to trust what I was getting and pass it on!

Once you are in the right state of consciousness and your heart is centered on a high, pure intention, you are connected to a source of wisdom and information that is very reliable. Of course, sometimes you will receive intuitive impressions when you’re going about your everyday life and you’re not in this special state. When that happens, you can always check on their accuracy by shifting into this state of consciousness and then exploring them further.

You can also exercise your intuitive senses in small ways throughout the day. First you must be adept at controlling your state of consciousness so that you can quickly shift state and “tune in.” It’s also wise and powerful to program yourself to live an intuitive life. If you work with the law of attraction to manifest powerful psychic experiences and you program your subconscious mind to deliver psychic insights to you on a regular basis, you will begin to have all sorts of amazing psychic experiences. The more you cultivate your abilities in this way, the more your intuition will break through at seemingly random moments to deliver helpful information to you.

One powerful way to do this is to meditate each morning and set a psychic intention for the day. You can ask for a general level of experience or something specific. For example, you might ask your higher self and spirit guides to help you align with a smooth journey and a productive day, and to send you insights, intuitions and experiences in support of this aim. You could also ask for something more specific, such being led to the answer to a question or the solution to a problem. One thing I often ask is, “What do I most need to know right now?” Ask for insights and intuitions to come to you throughout the day to lead you to what you are seeking. The more important this is to you, the more powerful experiences will come your way in answer to your prayers.

To find out if your impressions are accurate, you have to trust them enough to act on them and then pay attention to what happens next. Sometimes you won’t see the evidence you’re looking for because too much of it is hidden behind the scenes. For example, you may sense that someone is upset, but when you question them, they may deny it. This doesn’t necessarily mean you were wrong. You may receive a nudge to take a different route home and never know why. You have to be okay with the fact that you may never know why you received a certain impression, and assume that somehow it was designed to help you.

Finally, if you are too hung up on being right or accurate, you will block yourself. Part of being in the right frame of mind is being beyond ego and in a light, easy, relaxed state of being. Instead of putting pressure on yourself, pray for what you desire and then relax and allow it to come to you.

– Soul Arcanum

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Learning to Trust: the Ultimate Spiritual Challenge

Filed Under: Emotional Well-being, Healing, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Learning to Trust: the Ultimate Spiritual Challenge

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
Dear Soul Arcanum:

In a recent column, you wrote that we have no need to hide or protect ourselves or our secrets from other people out of a desire to be loved and accepted. While I want to believe you, I keep thinking that not everyone is going to respond in a loving way. Don’t you know that people can be petty and indiscreet? It would be wonderful if everyone was loving and spiritual, but that hasn’t been my experience. I think it’s normal for us to put on a facade in order to protect ourselves from people who may not be kind and compassionate. Am I missing something here? Keep up the good work, dear Soul Arcanum! – Liz

Dear Liz:

There are two ways to view the question of whether or not we can trust other people. One is from the perspective of the ego, which is separate and mortal, and the other is from the perspective of the higher self, which is universal and immortal.

What you’re struggling with is something everyone has to work through, for it’s at the heart of the human journey. Life in the physical would not be the powerful, dramatic learning experience it is if it were not for the ego. We seem to have a limited amount of time and resources here, and are unable to remember the spiritual life we knew before incarnating. Since it seems like this life is all we have, we are naturally very fearful about anything that could threaten our well-being or happiness. This is why physical life is the perfect situation in which to learn to rise above fear and grow into beings of greater faith and compassion.

I think learning to trust (have faith) is the ultimate spiritual challenge. This issue comes up for everyone as they shift from unconsciously interacting with life primarily through the lower chakras to consciously processing their experiences through the heart and upper chakras.

This shift occurs naturally as we gain self-awareness, realize why we do the things we do, and then try to make better choices. In emotional relationships with other people, everyone longs for more love: no matter how wonderful our childhoods were or how blessed we may be now, we’ve all had many experiences in which we hungered for more love and acceptance than we got.

This is because the experience we are really longing for is the perfect feeling of divine love and wholeness. On some level, we remember what it felt like before we separated from Source, and are constantly yearning to feel that sense of completeness again.

Since most of us don’t consciously recognize that our endless dissatisfaction arises from an unconscious memory of the divine, we go through life looking to other people to give us the love, approval and acceptance we think we need. As long as we look to other people to fulfill a longing that can only be truly satiated by the divine, of course, we will remain dissatisfied.

When begin to awaken in self-awareness, we not only realize why we react to experiences as we do, we learn that it’s silly to take the things that others say and do personally. We see that others are caught up in their own issues, and how they view us has very little to do with us and everything to do with their own past experiences, life lessons, and current mental and emotional state.

At this point we stop comparing ourselves and competing with others and begin to feel compassion for everyone, for we see that they are just like us: though they may go about it in some unskillful ways, what they want is to be happy, loved and accepted too. We then shift from seeking love and approval from others to offering them the same, and then our fear of judgment/rejection falls away.

Of course, this is not as easy or simple as I’m making it sound. No matter how spiritually evolved we may become, we’re still physical beings with very powerful survival instincts. When your intuition is trying to warn you about something or someone, you are wise to honor it. On an inner/emotional level, however, nothing and no one can truly harm you.

We all struggle to stay spiritually centered, to love and accept ourselves, to heal our fears and keep our hearts open, to trust that all is and will be well. In fact, a good amount of the time, I’m running the same social programs you describe in your question. Rising above the ego is an exhausting, demanding, endless challenge, but it helps to realize that we don’t really have any other good alternative – not if we want to feel at peace.

You see, I don’t think we can ever trust another person completely, at least not if we define trust as knowing that they would never do anything that we would consider to be hurtful. Fortunately, once we learn to trust in the benevolent nature of life itself and understand that nothing and no one can ultimately harm us, I don’t believe we need to trust other people. The feeling of divine love and contentment we’re really after can’t be found in temporal relationships anyway – it only be accessed through communion with the divine.

To cultivate trust in life’s benevolence, we must also remember the law of attraction, and how what we experience with other people is always a reflection of our own vibration. What we look for, we find; what we fear, we attract; what we desire, we flow toward.

When we’re afraid of being rejected or criticized, we tend to manifest those very experiences until we heal the inner wounds that make us fear we are not good enough somehow. When we accept who we really are, others accept us too. Have you ever met someone who was unapologetically scandalous or outrageous and just loved them for it even though you would never dare act that way yourself? You love them because they love themselves. Similarly, it’s the things we reject about ourselves that we fear others will reject about us too.

It’s thus wise and powerful to ponder how we feel about certain people and what we believe about relationships in general in order to become conscious of what we’re supposed to be learning.

For example, I tend to be a perfectionistic, hyper-responsible workaholic. As a result, I notice whenever people are lazy or irresponsible, and this sets off all sorts of ego-based judgments and fearful feelings for me. Instead of trying to make others become more responsible or trying to get everyone I deem to be irresponsible out of my experience (which would never work), my job is to work through my own fears surrounding issues of responsibility. (If my faith that all is and will be well was perfectly sound, I wouldn’t worry about a thing.) Once I have learned what I need to learn about this issue, I won’t attract or notice it anymore.

Your experiences in relationships truly are designed for your benefit, and if you view them as reflections of your own inner nature, they can be powerful tools for new spiritual growth. So while I encourage you to be gentle with yourself and remember that your struggle with trust is something we all go through, when you feel ready, please know that it is safe for you to greet others with an open heart.

It’s also totally worth it, for when we reach out to people on a soul level, all sorts of wonderful things begin to happen. For one thing, when we come from our souls instead of our egos, we tend to bring out others’ higher natures, which can transform ordinary situations into life-changing spiritual experiences.

– Soul Arcanum

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She’s Nervous about a Psychic Who Knows Her Embarassing Secrets

Filed Under: Emotional Well-being, Psychic Readings by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on She’s Nervous about a Psychic Who Knows Her Embarassing Secrets

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I visited a local psychic about three times, so naturally she got to know all my personal problems. I was very surprised when I saw her at the gym that I attend, and it made me feel uneasy. Then in the locker room she had the audacity to ask me outright if my son is still doing drugs, along with some other personal questions. I felt disgusted because in my opinion, she should not discuss the matters from my readings somewhere else. I motioned for her to shut her mouth, and she replied “Not to worry.” I have also noticed that when she talks to me, she stands very close, fixes her eyes on me, and asks personal questions. I think she’s reading me, and I feel uneasy every time I see her. I have made it clear that I no longer desire her services, and I’m no longer friendly with her. Can she harm me in any way? How do I prevent her from reading me?
– Liz

Dear Liz:

A dear friend of mine is a popular local psychologist, and I’ve had other friends react with similar nervousness when they realize I know him. While some worry that he’ll share their secrets with me, for the most part, they’re uneasy because who they are in public is so different from who they are when they’re in his office and getting “real,” so they don’t know how to act around him in a different setting. Since he would never betray their confidence, the real problem is the chasm between who these people really are and who they like to pretend to be in “polite society.”

Psychologists are trained and required by law to maintain strict confidentiality, and while psychics should follow the same protocol, there is no official training or laws governing this sort of work, so it’s natural for clients to worry. I maintain strict confidentiality for my clients and would never disclose that someone had even asked me for a reading, much less what we had discussed. This is especially important when someone else may know my client, or my client is a well-known celebrity or other public figure. So I certainly agree that this psychic is not handling herself in a professional manner! (I’m also doubtful of her psychic sensitivity, for she should be able to sense your uneasiness and respond accordingly.)

At the same time, I have to say that I don’t pick up any malice from her. Like so many psychics, she is probably just socially quirky. Psychics tend to be extraordinarily open and honest because so much that escapes others’ awareness is quite plain to us. While many people ONLY get emotionally naked in very private settings, we see through people’s social masks all the time.

Just the other day my son complained, “Having a psychic for a mom is so not fair! Not only do I get in trouble for the things I say, I get in trouble for the things I DON’T say!” He was referring to both my ability to sense his true thoughts and feelings, and my habit of insisting on bringing the truth to light.

I do this because I believe it’s a waste of time and disrespectful of everyone involved to be anything but real. Further, whenever we are false, we disconnect from our personal power to create positive change. In addition, on some level everyone knows the truth – they may not know it consciously, but they still know. When we use words to hide the truth or twist it around, we’re just playing games.

Life is not a competition to see who can keep their act together more than anyone else, it’s an experiment through which we all cultivate new wisdom and understanding. Everything we feel and experience happens for a good reason. We are all divine spirits living out big dramas here on Earth, and we’re in this together. So if someone is being false with me by lying, avoiding, denying, etc., I will usually communicate what I feel is really happening because I see no reason for anyone to hide. (As you might imagine, I have often been told that I’m very intense and honest to a fault!)

Given all of this, I see no need for you to block yourself from being read. Instead, I recommend you heal yourself of the fear of being exposed for who you really are, and the belief that if people knew the real you, they would find you somehow unworthy of their love and respect.

If you are honest with yourself, you’ll realize that the reason you want to keep your secrets hidden is because deep down, you’re ashamed of yourself for some reason. You’re afraid that somehow you’re not as good as other people, or your children aren’t as good as they “should” be, which must be your fault. If you recognize that everyone struggles with all sorts of problems just as big as yours, hopefully you’ll realize that there is no reason for you to feel bad about yourself.

It’s easy for psychics to forget that not everyone is like us. For example, we hear everyone’s most scandalous secrets, greatest fears and deepest regrets, and if we’re coming from a higher vibration as we should be, we don’t judge anyone for their problems and decisions. From Spirit’s perspective, there is nothing to feel ashamed about and therefore nothing to hide because you’ve not done anything wrong! There is only compassion for you and all you’re going through.

This is one of the qualities that makes great therapists true healers: they see you as divinely perfect just the way you are, and they help you to see your own divine perfection as well. In this way, you make peace with yourself and your life.

If I were you, I would thank this woman for showing you that she cares, and gently explain that you’d rather not talk about these things when you’re at the gym, for you’re not mentally prepared to deal with them then, and just want to get in a good workout.

Then instead of keeping all those skeletons buried in the back of some metaphorical closet, I encourage you to work on finding compassion for yourself. Whenever you feel the urge to cover something up or pretend to be someone you’re not, recognize that your ego is kicking in, and try to relax and let go of needing others’ acceptance. Remember that gaining others’ approval by pretending to be someone you’re not is pretty silly, and it will just fill your life with all sorts of meaningless, hollow relationships and interactions.

Remember too that getting emotionally vulnerable takes love and faith in yourself, and if you open up about what you’re really going through, it will encourage the people you talk with to do the same. Trust me – everyone feels the way you do – we all want to look good in others’ eyes. So instead of worrying about impressing others, try to give them what you’d like to receive: acceptance and understanding for who they really are and all they’re really going through.

If you do this, you will end up in some powerful, meaningful relationships wherein you know you can truly be yourself and be accepted for who you really are. Ironically, this approach will also bring you the respect and admiration of some wonderful kindred spirits.

 

– Soul Arcanum

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Meditation for Healing Mistrust

Filed Under: Emotional Well-being, Healing, Meditation by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Meditation for Healing Mistrust

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I would like to know if spirituality in any form can help with social anxiety. I don’t seem to be able to trust anyone, and I want to know if spiritual practices can help with this type of problem.
– Kathleen

Dear Kathleen:

First, please know that you are not alone; I frequently receive this question in various forms.

Mistrust is basically fear that we will be deceived, disappointed or betrayed. This fear is of the ego; it requires a general perspective of separation, of “I” versus “them.” Will they give to me as much as I give to them? Will they treat me as well as I treat them?

Trust is basically faith that whatever happens, everything will be fine. This faith is of the spirit. It requires a general perspective of unity, and assumes we are all in this together. Instead of competing against each other for what we want and need, we are all actors playing our own parts in this great performance called life, and it would certainly be boring if we were all perfect saints.

In my view, the ONLY practices that will truly help you heal your inability to trust others are spiritual practices, for a spiritual path will lead you from ego to spirit, from fear to faith. You will learn to look beyond surface appearances and past your temporal fears about betrayal and disappointment for the deeper meaning in your experiences, and connect with people on a higher level. When you do this, you will not only grow as a person and enjoy a sense of inner peace and security, you will also draw out the best in others. You will manifest a higher level of experience and draw a higher quality of people into your life.

It sounds like you are in the process of making a shift onto a more conscious spiritual path. Many people experience what you’re struggling with as they move from interacting with the world primarily via the third chakra (the solar plexus) to a more heart-based approach to life.

In relationships, our solar plexus sends us warnings to help us protect ourselves, our interests and our resources. When we shift our awareness up into our hearts, we are guided to love ourselves and others, to heal, nurture, and manifest emotional fulfillment. As we are making this shift, it’s natural to want to be able to trust more, and yet not know how to change our old habits.

Earth is a great spiritual school because it creates all sorts of fears about physical survival that one does not encounter in the non-physical. It is basically an exercise in learning to overcome fear in order to choose Spirit.

Further, we all carry a deep longing to recover the bliss of the non-physical, and we usually first seek that special feeling in earthly experiences and other people. This leads some people to drink, do drugs, or pursue other “highs” through extreme sports, sex, compulsive shopping, etc. Others may seek bliss by looking for someone perfect, someone they can always trust and count on – someone who won’t fail or disappoint them as their parents did.

This quest for a perfect person naturally leads to disappointment and cynicism. As we begin to build faith in something higher than our worldly experiences, we grow toward the thing we are truly longing for – a direct relationship with God. This leads us to peace with life and people – just the way they are.

When you learn how to step outside your ego and view people and experiences from the perspective of Spirit, you will rise above self-interest. Then if others are behaving in ways you have found hurtful or disappointing in the past, you won’t take it personally.

In time you may gain the ability to discern why others are behaving as they are, and what spiritual issues they are dealing with. Then you may even be able to offer them love, compassion and spiritual guidance as they struggle with their life lessons.

Further, by greeting others from a place of spirit instead of ego, you will bring out their higher natures. (By mistrusting people right off the bat, you have been doing the opposite: you’ve been expecting and therefore eliciting their worst tendencies.)

Silently communicating with people can have a PROFOUND effect on your experiences. Upon meeting or seeing someone, you might think, “The light in me greets the light in thee,” or “The love in me welcomes the love in you,” or “Namaste,” or something similar. When you do this with feeling, their soul will hear your soul even if their conscious mind remains oblivious.

Whenever you are feeling mistrustful, you can also practice this meditation:

Sit quietly and completely relax your body. Spend at least five minutes getting very deeply centered and relaxed via conscious breathing. Breathe in deeply to a count of four; hold that breath full in your belly to a count of four; exhale slowly to a count of four; pause before breathing in again to a count of four. Notice how a feeling of calm well-being washes over you, and how as you wait to take that next breath, you have a moment of worry – can you wait until the count of four? – then a feeling of relief and pleasure when you take the next inhale.

Notice how the next breath is always available to you, and observe how in knowing this, you can wait for that full count. You don’t need to worry that if you don’t breathe right now, you will suffer. You can trust and sit with your lungs empty for a few counts, for at any moment, you can always choose to breathe. It’s all up to you. The next breath is always available; well-being is always available. You just have to allow yourself to breathe it in.

Now visualize yourself as the teacher of a kindergarten class, for this will engage your higher self in dealing with others’ lower natures. Look around at all the children there. Some are from loving families, while others feel much more alone in the world. Some have been taught good manners, while others are struggling to learn how to follow the rules. As young children, each one is lovable and vulnerable in his or her own way.

You can see them struggling with problems and try to help them, but there are many things they will have to learn for themselves. Sometimes they behave badly: They may not want to share, they may throw tantrums now and then, they may even strike out at you when they’re afraid or frustrated. There are many other moments, however, when they reach out to touch you with curiosity, when they want to play with you and be your friend, when they lean against you with trust and affection.

You are at peace with all of this, for you accept that this is how children are: They can be adorable one moment and exasperating the next. You also know better than to take their behavior personally. You can see that they are all divine spirits struggling to learn their way in the world, just like you, and you know that they are doing the best they can. You also know that the more you love them and allow them to learn and grow in their own way, the more they will love and respect you, and want to do a good job for you.

Besides, your own happiness and well-being do not depend on the fleeting choices of any particular child – your well-being is as available to you as your next breath, and you choose when to breathe it in. You have learned that you can sit with disappointment or emptiness with trust that whenever you want or need to, you can breathe in the love, peace and happiness you desire.

If you trust in Spirit, you don’t have to trust other people, for you will live in full awareness that the source of your well-being is far greater than anything or anyone on Earth. I truly believe that if you ask Spirit to heal you and guide you to positive relationship experiences, your life will begin to change in wonderful ways.

– Soul Arcanum

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