Tag Archive: soul mates


Historical Portrait Sparks Strange Feelings

Filed Under: Past Lives, Reincarnation, Relationships, Strange Phenomena by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Historical Portrait Sparks Strange Feelings


Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I hope you can help me understand this strange occurance. While visiting a city in northern Europe a few months ago, I felt instantly drawn to a man I saw on a painting. I did some research, and it appears that this man was a statesman who died in the mid 17th century. While I was visiting the city, I felt this strange sense of familiarity. I am not saying that I was experiencing deja vu or recognizing specific places, but now and then, for a few seconds everything felt familiar to me. It was as if I had been there before but all in a very blurred sort of way. Since then, I have been looking for information about that man, getting to know more about him, and even drawing his portrait. I feel stupid to feel this attraction because this is so unreal! He looks exactly like the kind of men I was attracted to as a younger girl. I really don’t know what to think of all this. Is it just my imagination? Is it just because I am very sensitive to the arts and historical places, or is my unconscious trying to tell me something?

S.

Dear S.:

While this is almost certainly past life related, before I go into that, I do want to mention one other possibility. Thinking of a particular person in spirit tends to draw that spirit close, so it’s possible for spirits to become attached to any item that makes people here think about them. I can think of no item better suited for this than a portrait. If the spirit of this man is attached to his portrait, then when people gaze at it and wonder about him, he may try to influence them. This would be especially true if someone who is particularly psychically sensitive were involved. If this spirit was stuck between planes, the spirit could then attach to such an individual and try hard to communicate with them. I don’t feel this is what is happening here, but I wanted to mention it so that people know it’s a possibility.

To me, it is clear that you knew this man in a past life, and that you had a loving, positive relationship with him. I actually hear such stories all the time. When someone is famous in some way, it makes it easy for anyone who knew them in a past life to find and recognize them on a soul level.

I often hear from individuals who are certain that they have a soul connection to some figure in the media. Like you, they tend to feel kind of crazy about this, but I think it makes perfect sense. It’s not like they feel this way about all sorts of different celebrities – there is just one figure to whom they feel strangely connected. Imagine that you knew and loved someone in a past life, and then you saw their picture on a billboard or saw them on the evening news. Most likely, you would have the classic symptoms of a past life encounter: time would seem to stop for a moment, your attention would be completely grabbed by that person, and you would have this strange feeling that you either know them, will know them, or simply have some profound connection to them.

On a logical level these connections may seem unlikely, but they happen more than common logic would explain because we are naturally drawn toward people we’ve known in past lives. It’s a bit like gravity; what goes up must come down, and what is pulled apart must come back together. So, for example, if you have a strong past life connection to the mayor of some town in Idaho, then the one time that mayor makes national news, synchronicity would make sure you saw it.

This brings us to your experience. I encourage you to review how you came to visit that particular city in northern Europe and how you came to view that portrait in particular. People often have inexplicable feelings of affinity, curiosity, and familiarity with places and cultures from past lives, so someone who has always longed to go to Japan or Ireland probably does so for past life reasons.

As for how you came to view that particular portrait, I’m betting that you either felt strongly drawn toward that experience or that synchronicity played a role. For example, you may have seen a brochure about a tour that included that portrait and felt a very strong desire to take that tour. Sometimes the way we make such connections is more unconscious; it’s like we find ourselves sort of sleep walking along like puppets being guided by some outside force. It’s a difficult thing to describe, but if you’ve had such an experience, you know what I’m talking about.

Often these connections come about through interesting and unlikely twists in the course of our experience. For example, we may have a conscious plan to do one thing, but then our alarm clock malfunctions, we miss the bus, it suddenly starts to pour, and so we duck into the nearest doorway. There, we run into someone we’re meant to meet or we discover something like your portrait – a strong tie to a past life or our future destiny.

How this happens for the individual largely depends on how consciously psychic they are. If you’re the sort of person who listens within and acts on your intuitions, then you will naturally flow toward the answers to your questions, destined connections, and the fulfillment of your desires. If you tend to be more physically focused and rational, these strange experiences tend to be rarer and to come about in stranger ways, for the Universe has to work much harder when we’re not working with it; when we are constantly asking for direction and acting on the inner prompts we receive, we make it easy for the Universe to guide us.

I love that you mentioned that this man in the portrait looks just like the sort of men you were attracted to when you were younger, for I believe that both past and future loves play a strong role in the “types” we are attracted to. One of my earliest experiences of “destiny” began when I was around 12 years old and saw Mikhail Baryshnikov on the cover of People magazine. Like you with your portrait, time seemed to stop and I was gripped by his image. I remember thinking that he was the most beautiful man I’d ever seen. Fast forward seven years to when I met my future husband for the first time. My first thought was: He looks exactly like Baryshnikov! I am convinced that, instead of being drawn to my husband because he looked like a famous dancer, I was drawn to the image on the magazine cover because he looked like my future husband!

It’s possible that you’re about to meet this man from the past again – in his new form of course. As these destined junctures approach, all sorts of interesting things tend to happen. It’s possible that your soul knows that you’re about to reconnect, and in searching for him, it led you back to the last place you saw this man. (How romantic!) The good news is that if you keep following your impulses and instincts like this, if you’re destined to reconnect, you will naturally be drawn together again.

To get more information about your potential history with this man, you might pursue past life regression therapy. Through a psychic reading, you could find out if you’re going to meet him again and what your subconscious may be trying to tell you through these unusual feelings.

– Soul Arcanum

 

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She Always Wants What She Can’t Have

Filed Under: Emotional Well-being, Law of Attraction, Manifesting, Relationships, Spiritual Growth by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on She Always Wants What She Can’t Have


Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I have a very bad case of wanting what I can’t have, especially when it comes to relationships. I might have a crush on a guy until he becomes a real prospect, but then I begin to have doubts and get scared off. There are two men in my heart who were boyfriends in the past. I wasn’t serious about them when they pursued me and I easily let both of them go. When I thought about committing to them, I had all sorts of excuses for why they weren’t right for me. Years later, they are married fathers leading happy lives and I am single and going through tough times alone. I am now able to see how great they were and how my excuses for not getting serious about them were poor ones. I can’t tell you how hard I kick myself for letting them go. It’s truly eating me up, loving them deeply now and wanting them back and thinking how much more meaningful and fulfilling my life would be now had I been wiser before. I don’t want to be obsessive and stuck, which is how I feel, but I don’t want to stop loving them because even with all the painful regret, the love somehow feels better than indifference and the petty criticisms I had for them when I was dating them. I want to move on, stop the cycle of running from love, and be happy. Please help!

O.

Dear O:

Thank you for doing such a wonderful job of explaining your situation. What you describe is a common pattern; in fact, I know a number of people personally who do the same sort of thing. I’m sure you’re familiar with the term self-sabotage and the idea that many people unconsciously sabotage their efforts to create what they want in their lives. As a hypnotherapist, I see this a bit differently. While it’s true that people may do things that don’t appear to make sense, there is always a good reason why people do the things they do.

For example, Joann came to me at more than 200 pounds, deeply frustrated and desperate to find a way to lose weight. She had been on countless diets in her 47 years and had lost tens of pounds over and over again. Every time she got down to a size 8, she would start putting weight back on and regain all she had lost and more. In this way, she crept from around 145 pounds to over 200 despite years of dieting.

When I took her into a deep trance and asked her to go back to a significant event in her weight struggle, she at first relayed some upsetting but relatively minor experiences such as being embarrassed of her body as an adolescent and an incident in which she couldn’t fit into the jeans she was trying to borrow from a friend. These were just the outer layers of the onion, however. Eventually when asked to go back to the next significant event, she began to cry and hyperventilate. As I walked her through what she was experiencing, it came out that she had been raped at the age of 22; it was after this that she began to put on weight in an effort to feel less attractive and thus safer. She had been a size 8 at the time of the rape, and every time she became a size 8 again, she would grow very uncomfortable and immediately try to remedy what her subconscious perceived to be a problem by gaining weight again.

When I brought her out of trance, it was clear that a light bulb had come on: She now understood that she hadn’t been sabotaging herself – she had been trying to protect herself. The problem wasn’t a lack of self-love; it was the unfounded belief that if she didn’t carry extra weight, she would be hurt again. Once we healed and released the past trauma and put some empowering new beliefs in place, she found it relatively easy to lose the weight and keep it off.

Perhaps you’ve already figured out what this has to do with you. In case you haven’t, I’ll offer you a case that is a closer match to what you’re going through. Sarah came to me with a problem similar to yours: she was in her late thirties and had never been married because she too always wanted what she couldn’t have. She only wanted men who were unavailable for some reason. A couple of times, she did develop crushes on men who eventually returned her interest, but once she could have them, she didn’t want them anymore.

Regression therapy uncovered a number of possible causes for this pattern, such as her father abandoning the family when she was small, which led her mother into a depression from which she never recovered. From this she developed the belief that it’s never safe to give your heart completely to another human being.

More powerful, however, was the past life she relived in which her parents wanted her to marry a man of means but she chose to marry a penniless youth for love. Though he was handsome and romantic when he was courting her, her husband turned out to be a mean drunk who beat her and the children they had together. They lived in miserable destitution because he was too drunk to earn a living and would spend the money she was able to bring in on alcohol. She would sometimes see the man she had chosen NOT to marry with his wife, looking happy and prosperous, and think to herself that she had made a terrible choice. She died young in childbirth, and as she was dying, she was very worried about what would become of her young children with just their alcoholic father to depend upon. As she was dying, she was filled with regret and thoughts of how just one bad decision can ruin your life.

As a result of this traumatic past life experience, she was incredibly indecisive in this life: every time she was faced with a decision, she would get anxious and second-guess herself. She was also forever thinking that the grass must be greener on the other side. Though she consciously believed that she wanted to fall in love and get married, on a subconscious level, she did not believe this was a wise or safe thing to do. This led her to constantly chase after men she could never actually catch, and to run away from those who chased her. Within two years of resolving this past trauma and the limiting beliefs underlying her lack of fulfillment in love, she was happily married to the man of her dreams.

To resolve your pattern, first you must stop beating yourself up about it. Assume that your subconscious mind is trying to help you and that your job is to get your conscious and subconscious minds working in harmony. Imagine that your goal is to move a dresser: if your conscious mind is pushing forward on one side and your subconscious mind is pushing forward on the other side, you’re going to end up very frustrated. Now imagine that you can bring your subconscious mind over to your side to push WITH you: suddenly, things start to move forward with surprising ease.

I know of no faster way to totally transform your life than to begin to consciously work with your subconscious mind and higher self. Since every person’s story is unique, I encourage you to seek hypnotherapy so you can uncover and resolve whatever may be keeping you from a truly fulfilling experience in love.

Finally, it’s normal to continue to love people we’ve loved in the past, but that doesn’t mean we’re meant to be with them in the future. I think you’re hung up on these old boyfriends because they are symbols of the sort of man and relationship you want. Instead of lamenting the ones who got away, I encourage you to focus on the future and open your heart to meeting someone new.

Soul Arcanum

 


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Why We Feel a Magnetic Pull Toward Certain Individuals

Filed Under: Past Lives, Reincarnation, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Why We Feel a Magnetic Pull Toward Certain Individuals


Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I am acquainted with a gentleman who evokes a strange reaction in me. Every time I see him, I feel a strong pull towards him but also a profound sense of grief. I know his energy is different from anyone else’s I have met; it’s very strong and magnetic. I don’t particularly like the way he looks, the way he dresses or even the sound of his voice. Since I don’t find him attractive, I’m baffled as to why I feel so drawn to him. After seeing him, I always end up in tears. I don’t really know what I am crying about but my soul seems to know something I don’t. I’m hoping you can explain why we feel magnetically drawn toward certain individuals and what we’re supposed to do with those feelings.

K.

Dear K.:

I know the feeling you describe well and am sure we have many readers who have had similar experiences. Though we tend to associate karmic reunions with the soul mate experience of “love at first sight,” in truth we may experience any number of different feelings upon meeting someone we’ve known in a past life.

I have experienced love at first sight a few times, and each time this happened, I wound up in a very powerful romantic relationship. I have also, however, met individuals and instantly felt inexplicable terror, unease, or simply a strange sense of familiarity. Experience has taught me to trust these feelings as meaningful. For example, the instant I first met a man who would one day end up stalking and attacking me, I felt inexplicably terrified. I am convinced that we had very intense karma between us, and that this is why he became obsessed with me. On a more positive note, when I interviewed for a job one summer in Chicago, I knew that I would both get a job offer and accept it because the woman who was to be my boss felt like someone I was going to be seeing a lot of.

It is possible to feel both drawn toward someone and unnerved by them. The relationships these connections foster usually prove to be powerful spiritual teachers. For example, when I was in college, I got involved with a <q>mean drunk</q> and went through a very painful time. When I first met this young man, I felt strongly drawn to him and at the same time profoundly uneasy around him. I believe I was intuitively sensing both the karma already between us and the challenges ahead.

The more psychically awake you are, the more you’ll tend to notice such feelings and be able to sense what they’re all about. However, even people who are psychically asleep may have such experiences when the karmic bond involved is very strong or important to their destined life plans. I believe these feelings arise from an inner spiritual compass; they help us to recognize the members of our soul family from one lifetime to the next, and they compel us to interact with the people we need to resolve karma with in order to fulfill our destined plans for each particular lifetime.

If before incarnating, two souls plan to meet and marry, they will carry this plan like a seed in their subconscious until the time comes for it to be set in motion. When they do meet, the seed comes to life and begins to grow. Their reunion awakens this memory on a more or less conscious level, which creates a sense of familiarity. The energy (karma) between them stirs up feelings that belie the nature of their existing connection. While karmic reunions tend to involve key relationships like romantic partnerships, they can involve all sorts of other bonds. Parents and children would experience strong feelings of familiarity if they were to meet for the first time as adult strangers do. In fact, adoptive parents often have strong feelings of connection when they first meet the children they are going to adopt. People who are highly psychic may recognize people they’ve known in past lives whether those people are going to be important characters in their futures or not.

It is always wise to trust our intuitive feelings and instincts. The first thing to do when these feelings arise is pay attention, for they are signs that something important is happening. When we feel frightened by someone for no apparent reason, we should take it as a sign that we should tread very carefully. When we feel drawn to someone, we should take it as a sign that we are meant to interact with them.

My feeling is that you loved this man deeply in a past life. This may have been a romantic relationship but it could just have easily been a different sort of relationship altogether. He could have been your son, your brother, your mother, your sister, your aunt, your friend or your teacher. Since you feel both strongly drawn toward him and at the same time experience profound feelings of grief whenever you see him, it is likely that when you loved him in a past life, he died before you did and you never fully healed from that loss. Just as we carry our strength and wisdom forward from past lives, we also carry old wounds that still need healing. When you see this man again, it reawakens the energy of the grief you have carried with you from the past. This grief is coming up in order to be healed and released. This will happen naturally if you simply allow those feelings to flow. Allow yourself to cry even if you don’t know why you’re crying. Allow yourself to feel what you really feel even if it seems crazy to care for someone you don’t really know well – this lifetime.

When you judge your feelings as nonsensical, you stop the flow of this energy. If instead, you surrender to your feelings with trust that they make sense on some level, you will allow those old feelings to flow through you, which will enable you to find peace in the present. You could also engage in past life therapy with a hypnotherapist to bring whatever is happening on a soul level up into your conscious awareness. This can lead to instant insights, healing and transformation.

I don’t know if it’s practical for you (my feeling is that it is not), but sometimes confessing our feelings is enough to initiate a profound shift. When we tell people we feel a strange sense of connection to them, the experience moves from an internal level to an external one, which relieves psychic tension. This makes sense because we feel strongly drawn toward someone because we are supposed to interact with them. Of course, the other person may not share our sense of connection, for they may not be as psychically awake and aware as we are. Someone who is psychically turned off may not feel anything, while someone keenly awake may both feel a sense of connection and know or intuit the reason behind it by remembering the past life experiences involved or the future destiny they are being drawn into.

It sounds like you are somewhere in the middle in that you are aware of feeling drawn toward him without knowing why. If you trust your feelings and allow them to come to the surface either of your awareness or your outer experience, you will naturally resolve any karmic tension involved and begin to fulfill your destiny as concerns this individual. Please do keep in mind that feeling strongly drawn toward someone does not mean that we are supposed to be in relationship to them forever, but rather that they are one important stop along an infinitely larger journey.

Soul Arcanum

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Soul Work, Soul Contracts and Karma

Filed Under: Destiny/Higher Plan, Karma, Past Lives, Reincarnation, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Soul Work, Soul Contracts and Karma

 

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I’m confused about the nature of soul work and soul contracts. I was involved with a man I know to be my soul mate. He wouldn’t commit and was seeing a younger woman. Through various experiences, I came to realize that I have shared a number of past lives with him. In the most recent past lives as well as in this life, a third soul has interfered with us establishing a relationship. (It is always this younger woman. Whenever we start to work things out, she interferes.) I know we have a deep soul connection, but I also know that he is afraid of doing the soul work to resolve the karma between us because it is painful. I need to know if it is possible to complete the soul work between us without him, since he is refusing to fulfill the soul contract between us. We were supposed to be together, but he is thinking of marrying the younger woman. I wish him the best but want to be free of all of this suffering.

Karan

Dear Karan:

I’m not crazy about the term soul contract; it could be misleading by causing some of us to feel like our loved ones somehow owe us something, and if they don’t do what we think they should do, then somehow they are failing us or reneging on some cosmic deal. When we talk about working on karma, we are wise to always focus on what we can do to make things right with others, not what we think they need to do to make things right with us.

Many people assume that finding a soul mate is the answer to their lifelong prayers for love, but this is often far from the truth. Soul mate relationships tend to be intense, passionate and often volatile because they are ripe with learning and growth opportunities. Further, many people view divorce or the end of long-term love affairs as the failure of those relationships, but in truth, those endings always propel us forward into new lessons and experiences, so they facilitate new growth and the potential for greater love.

I would keep an open mind about the deeper nature of your relationship, for no one can say for sure what the higher plan for you all may be. Even if your assumptions are valid, then the three of you all have strong soul connections to each other. It may be that your man has chosen to fulfill the contract he has with this younger woman and to tackle the lessons involved in that relationship instead of focusing on the lessons that your relationship may have to offer.

This brings us to the wisdom of remembering that we all have free will. Life puts before us an endless smorgasbord of learning paths and potentials, and we get to choose moment by moment what we will savor next. It’s entirely possible that your man is following his heart and in line with fulfilling his destiny, and is therefore not really avoiding anything. When we assume that we are right and others are wrong about deeper truths such as the soul nature of a relationship, we are almost always stuck in ego.

It’s also possible that you are caught up in a vow from a past life that is no longer valid or beneficial. When we make sacred vows, they can follow us from lifetime to lifetime until we consciously withdraw them and tell all levels of our being that we are free to move on. When we are caught up in an old vow, we often experience just what you describe: a tumultuous roller coaster of passion and conflict, union and separation, followed by reunion and another round of drama.

It’s clear to me that you have lessons to learn from the situation exactly as it is, and that it would be wise to smile upon all that happens with trust in a higher plan. It may be, for example, that your soul agreement was to come together in just the manner you describe: to return together lifetime after lifetime and feel that sense of connection, only to have him be pulled away or choose another path, and for you to learn to make peace with his decision and not having things go the way you think they should go.

Not even the greatest psychic can say for sure exactly what has been happening throughout your lifetimes together, and more importantly, WHY. One thing I do know is that any perspective that blames one party in a situation as wrong and the other as somehow unfairly victimized is very limited and distorted. On a soul level, you are agreeing to go through all of this too, so there must be a good reason for it. Given your inner conflict and turmoil about it all, it clearly holds powerful lessons for you personally.

All of this being said, I do understand how you feel. I had a similar experience with a woman I remembered having a very deep and troubled past life history with. I wanted us to do everything we could to make peace with each other and cultivate new love so that the next time we meet, we would have lots of good karma going in instead of repeating the same old patterns. She, however, demonstrated no interest whatsoever in working on our karma together. It became clear to me that I was far more troubled about the state of our relationship than she was, and perhaps there was great wisdom in simply letting it all go. Certainly it made no sense to insist on dancing with someone who clearly didn’t want to dance with me. To my great surprise, I eventually realized that I had learned and grown more from her refusal to “love me” as I wanted to be loved than I would have from working on the relationship with her.

What did I learn? I learned that I can’t always bend my spiritual path in the direction I think it should go. I learned to surrender with trust that everything happens for a good reason. I learned that I don’t need anyone else to do anything in particular for me to feel better – that I can reach for a high vibration and cultivate love and joy in my heart all on my own. I learned to trust even more in the law of attraction, and to keep in mind that when relationships go against nature or a higher plan, it’s like swimming upstream to try to keep them together. Perhaps most of all I learned that I don’t have to get a certain person’s love or approval to be happy and to love and approve of myself.

This is a really huge lesson to learn, for we all hunger for love, and we also tend to value the love of people who are hard to win over more than the love of the people who already adore us. We can thus spend lifetime after lifetime seeking the love of one particular individual obsessively, when deep down, what we really hunger for us a sense of wholeness and well-being in and of ourselves. All these relationships, soul agreements, soul contracts, karmic entanglements and the like are just dramas through which we work out the love within us and between us and the Divine, which means we can get what we need through an endless number of experiences. We don’t need any particular individual to soar free and clear of old issues, wounds and hang-ups, for everything is ultimately about us and our own journey to Divine Grace.

I recommend you let go of making this guy so special in your mind and heart, and begin to look at all of this in a more general, symbolic way. What does this man symbolize for you? What are the lessons and issues you’ve been working out through this relationship? If you focus on those deeper personal issues, you can set yourself free of this drama and move on to new lessons and more fulfilling connections. Your own heart and soul determine the quality of your experiences far more than your history does; if you are at peace and full of love, you can soar free of old patterns to cultivate much higher levels of experience.

– Soul Arcanum

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The Influence of Past Lives on Current Relationships

Filed Under: Past Lives, Reincarnation, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on The Influence of Past Lives on Current Relationships


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Dear Soul Arcanum:

I started dating my new boyfriend two months ago, and we have a very harmonious, happy relationship. After a month, I began to receive pictures in my mind of us together but in Victorian dress. The scenario I get is that he was courting me and I was starting to fall in love with him, but something went wrong on my part; I’m not sure what it was. As a result, he broke off the relationship and I never saw him again in that life.  Now I sometimes get the feeling that we have a second chance, or feel anxious that I will make a horrible mistake which will end the relationship. Of course, this is also a product of my own insecurities. I have asked him if he has any fears or insecurities about me or our relationship, but he has none. I haven’t told him about these past life memories, but we both found it strange that we remember seeing each other growing up on two separate occasions (we grew up in the same area), but never met officially and felt an immediate kinship when we did meet. In any event, I am curious if these mental pictures are from another time, or if they are just a product of my subconscious working out my fears. I’d appreciate your feedback.

Elle

Dear Elle:

These definitely sound like past life memories to me, especially given the Victorian style of dress. However, before we look for metaphysical explanations, it’s prudent to rule out some conventional psychological reasons why you may be thinking and feeling as you have been.

It’s possible that despite the fact that on a conscious level you are sure of what you want in this relationship, deep down you may fear commitment for some reason. It’s normal to fear the loss of any great blessing, and when it comes to relationships, this fear can lead to commitment issues if you want to avoid potential pain in the future even more than you want to enjoy great love now.

It’s also possible that you dread all the work and sacrifices that intimate relationships require, and are repressing awareness of this fear because it’s threatening to your self-image. Of course, it may also be that deep down, you don’t feel worthy of great love, and these feelings of unworthiness seem so threatening that you are manufacturing potential problems in this relationship in order to avoid having to work through your insecurities.

Some people will actually work themselves into a state where they believe all sorts of unfounded things in order to give themselves a reason to sabotage a relationship that feels too close or threatens to unearth some overwhelming issues. I’m not saying that this is what is happening in this relationship – in fact, none of these explanations feel right to me at all – but they are certainly worth considering.

To sort out what is going on, I recommend hypnotherapy with a therapist who has experience in working with past lives. Once you become conscious of the roots of your uneasiness, you can learn whatever you need to learn from these feelings, which will empower you to create something better this time around. It will also quickly lead you to new peace regarding all of this.

Hypnotherapy designed to communicate directly with your higher self in order to reach for the true cause of these feelings is sure to reveal their source, and can also empower you to leap into a higher level of experience in this area of your life. Often, the cause for inexplicable problems could never be predicted or discerned from a conscious level of awareness. We can try to reason our way to them without ever accessing the true insights that produce quick and lasting healing.

This is what is so fascinating and powerful about hypnotherapy: you just never know what is going to come up, but whatever does come up is always just right given your healing focus or intention. What comes up also always makes sense in retrospect – it just can’t be foreseen from a conscious state of awareness.

Some people are hesitant to explore memories that may be unpleasant, but this very resistance suggests that fear is running the show and is thus preventing them from attaining the peace, happiness and fulfillment they long for. Instead of causing new distress, past life work is always therapeutic and cathartic; by making peace with the past, we are empowered to shed old problems and manifest a higher level of experience.

There are endless ways we may resist facing some scary truth about ourselves. In a fear-driven attempt to understand and gain control over the course of our experience, often we make up stories about the way things are that are distorted or skewed. I don’t feel that this is what you’re doing, however. I feel that you’re in the process of getting conscious about some old issues and lessons so that you can consciously choose differently this time around, and thus manifest a better outcome for yourself. In fact, I can see you in the past life you describe, feeling heart-broken over the way things went and vowing to yourself that would learn from that experience and never make that same “mistake” again.

It is the powerful energy of that vow that is bringing these past life memories back to you now. It’s like you are reaching through time to remind yourself that you have made this journey before, and would be wise to make different choices this time around.

To shed your worries, it’s wise to trust that all we need to do is listen to our hearts and give the best of ourselves to whatever we’re trying to create in our lives and everything will work out just fine. There is really nothing to be anxious about. Everything happens for a higher reason: either to lead us to something we need to learn or to lead us to the fulfillment of some desire. Your experience here is a bit extraordinary in that you are gaining conscious awareness of the lesson you are currently working on and the karma you’re in the process of resolving. We do this sort of thing all the time, but where most people are feeling our way in the dark, you’ve had a light switched on!

When we have faith that everything happens for a higher reason, it’s easy to lighten up, which leads us into a higher vibration and empowers us to consciously influence the course of our experience. It’s a bit ironic, but when we can relax about whether a certain relationship will go the way we want it to because we have faith that one way or another, we can manifest what we want in love, we either find the power to draw from that relationship what we desire, or we slip away from it to embrace greater potentials.

When we can get into this calm, faithful frame of mind, our anxieties naturally fall away, and this is when we can begin to truly enjoy all the blessings in our lives. (It’s hard to truly enjoy anything if we’re constantly anxious that we’ll lose it, and in losing it, lose all hope of finding the happiness and fulfillment we long for.)

You would therefore be wise to trust that there is nothing to get anxious about here. Be grateful for the love and other blessings in your life, and give the best of yourself to them. Give thanks for this gift of awareness, and use it to make the wisest choices you can. By devoting your mind and heart to the cultivation of faith, love, and all that you desire, you will bless yourself and align with deep fulfillment.

– Soul Arcanum

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How to Attract True Love

Filed Under: Law of Attraction, Manifesting, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on How to Attract True Love

 

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)

Dear Soul Arcanum:

How can I use the law of attraction to manifest true love with the perfect man for me?
Kezzer

Dear Kezzer:

There are a couple of ideas we need to explore before moving on to the subject of manifesting true love.

While reunions with soul mates tend to happen on a destined schedule, in many cases, we may have some control over the speed with which we draw certain people into our lives. Usually such reunions occur when ‘the time is right’ and ‘the stars align.’ Other times, the only thing holding us up is a lack of readiness for such a relationship on our part or the part of the one we’re seeking.

It’s important to realize that the perfect relationship for us at any given time may not be one that is meant to last a lifetime or fulfill all our dreams for love, passion and harmony. We are all in the process of healing old wounds, working through old karma and growing into greater personal potential, and the greatest forum for doing so is our relationships. This means that every relationship is perfect for us at that time, for it is there to fulfill some desire or teach us something we need to learn in order to move on to a higher experience of love.

This doesn’t mean that we have to take whatever comes our way. In fact, there are lots of things we can do to prepare ourselves for true love. Should we have to wait on destiny in order to meet up with a certain individual, we can also create a delightful experience of love in the mean time.

One of the most common misconceptions I run into in my counseling work is the idea that if a relationship doesn’t work out, something must have gone wrong. In fact, all relationships arise for a good reason, and from a higher spiritual perspective, these become clear as underlying patterns of experience. It can therefore be very helpful to seek higher awareness via meditation, hypnotherapy and other spiritual practices, or via spiritual counseling with a gifted intuitive reader, for when we become conscious of the issues we’re working on, we can spark breakthroughs and fast progress.

The first thing I recommend is to work on any subconscious (or conscious) issues that may be holding you back from a fulfilling romantic experience. We all have these issues, for behind and beneath all we do there is profound longing to be loved and to love others on a deep, rich level. Further, we’ve all had painful or less than fulfilling experiences of love in the past, and if these are left unresolved, unhealed or incomplete somehow, they will hold us back from greater fulfillment until they are addressed.

All of this is perfect, for it’s what propels us toward personal growth and spiritual evolution. Our longing for a deeper sense of happiness and fulfillment keeps us trying, which is all we need to keep doing in order to naturally discover, heal and release old wounds, karma and issues. In my view, it is love and the longing for love that makes the world go ’round and gets us out of bed each morning.

As each person is a unique and beautiful individual, the issues holding people back from true love are unique and personal to them. This is another reason why it’s important to go beyond the advice and philosophies of self-help gurus and get our hands dirty by embracing spiritual practices and therapies.

There are some general common stumbling blocks, of course. I think we’re all familiar with how a lack of self-esteem can prevent people from pursuing a relationship that is truly healthy and fulfilling. Similarly, fears of rejection and abandonment hold many people back from fulfilling their dreams for love. Limiting beliefs about what is possible in love are also common obstacles. When these issues remain unconscious, they hold us emotionally hostage until they are faced, worked through and transformed to align with a higher level of experience.

Whenever we find ourselves in a pattern that is frustrating or unfulfilling, we are therefore wise to look to our inner world. To make new progress, we must examine old wounds, deep fears and limiting beliefs, and continue to stretch ourselves to heal, empower ourselves and reach for greater personal potential. If you feel blocked, I highly recommend hypnotherapy, through which you can go back and heal and release old wounds and also cultivate new beliefs and a more constructive approach to love.

As I mentioned above, there are things we can do to align with a delightful experience of love even as we’re doing whatever inner work is necessary in order to prepare for the soul mate experience our souls are yearning for.

How we feel about love is ultra-important, for we tend to manifest what we expect, and what we focus upon grows larger in our experience. Just as it is important to let go of worrying about symptoms and focus on well-being in order to cultivate good health, we are wise to look past whatever we lack in terms of love and focus on embodying love itself in order to manifest more of it in our lives.

The more we give our attention to love with a positive feeling, the more we become magnets for it in all sorts of wonderful ways. If you don’t have a partner to shower with love and affection yet, you can love the one you’re with, by which I mean that you infuse all the relationships already in your life with more love. Flow love to your friends, family, neighbors and acquaintances. Upon greeting someone, say to yourself, The love in me greets the love in thee. Visualize your heart chakra openly flowing love and good will to everyone you meet.

One of the most powerful tools for working with the law of attraction is to write the story of what you want to happen in the past tense. The key to infusing this exercise with lots of power lies in the emotional vibration it carries you into.

First just sit for a few moments and think about all you long for in love. Imagine yourself with a partner who has all the traits you find attractive. Take a few moments to get very clear about how you want to feel. Allow images to come to you as you do this. You may imagine yourself receiving flowers, going on dates and kissing someone passionately. You may see yourself attending family functions with your partner on your arm. You may imagine how wonderful it will be to have someone you adore to snuggle up with in bed. Allow this to just flow naturally.

Now sit down and write out the story of how you found this love. This is not going to be published, so don’t censor yourself. Do make sure your phrasing is positive, however, and most importantly, take time as you write this to pause and sink into all the wonderful feelings that imagining this brings up for you. If you really get into this exercise, your heart will soon be soaring. You will feel like your chest is tingling or expanding with light or energy – this is what you want!

Once your story is complete and you’ve basked in all those wonderful feelings for a while, let it go. You can put it away in a drawer or file it away on your computer. It doesn’t matter. You’re not going to go back to it because you’re going to trust that what you desire has been set in motion, and the love you long for is already on its way to you.

If you now just consciously strive to embody and flow love to everyone you meet, and you stay in a high vibration, soon delightful love will be knocking on your door.

 

– Soul Arcanum

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Why Do We Feel So Attracted to Some People?

Filed Under: Destiny/Higher Plan, Karma, Past Lives, Reincarnation, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Why Do We Feel So Attracted to Some People?


Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

Why do we fall in love with someone we hardly know? Why does this sort of thing happen? If we don’t really know them, how can we love them? I find myself in this situation and it’s just not right because it breaks all social rules and conventions. I feel a very strong, happy pull towards a particular gentleman. It’s like my heart recognizes him and is so happy to hear his name and see him, but my head is telling me to stop being silly. I think he has a soft spot for me as well. Is this just some fleeting fantasy, or is his energy pulling me toward him? Are there spiritual reasons for why we feel so drawn to some people from the moment we meet them?
K.R.

Dear K.R.:

The first thing that struck me about your question is your assumption that if something breaks social rules and conventions, it’s just ‘not right.’ I believe the only way to know what is truly right is to listen to our hearts, for there are all sorts of social conventions that are pretty crazy.

There is always a reason why we feel a certain way, but that doesn’t mean we should act on all our feelings. For example, we may feel like punching someone who makes us angry or like eating a huge bag of candy, but that doesn’t mean we’re wise to act on those impulses.

Often we distract ourselves with momentary obsessions in order to avoid facing feelings or issues that are overwhelming. Many people in unhappy marriages try to distract themselves by projecting their unfulfilled desires on a third party. This allows them to focus on something that feels good while avoiding upsetting or disturbing thoughts and feelings.

Repressed desires can also spark inexplicable attractions. Many crushes are simply the result of boredom. We all crave excitement and romance, and if we are repressing our desires by not pursuing our dreams, the passion burning within us will seek release in some other way.

I’m not suggesting that all strange attractions are somehow misguided or unfounded – far from it – but in order to determine if there are good soulful reasons behind a strange attraction, it’s important to eliminate some of the more mundane possibilities. This is sort of like ghost hunting: before we attribute phenomena to something otherworldly, we’re wise to rule out common explanations.

There are many spiritual reasons we may feel strangely attracted to someone. Usually this strong pull is karmic in nature, and suggests a positive past life relationship. Since there are many reasons we may feel as we do, however, we’re wise to consider other possibilities. For example, we may fall in love with someone we didn’t know in a past life simply because they remind us of someone we once loved deeply. In these cases, we may have that familiar feeling of recognizing someone from a past life, and old feelings of love and passion may be stirred up even though the person before us is not the soul we are “remembering.”

This can also happen with people we’ve known in the past in this life. Often we are attracted to someone because they remind us of someone else. This doesn’t have to be romantic: if we meet someone who reminds us of a beloved grandfather, we may feel strongly drawn to him, especially if we haven’t fully grieved Grandpa yet. Our subconscious is forever guiding us to finish old business and resolve personal issues, so if we meet someone who stirs up something in us that needs more attention, it’s normal to feel a sense of attraction.

Our souls are also guiding us to what we need to experience in order to learn whatever we need to learn next. I often counsel women who are looking for true love, and as I peek into the future, I may see a man coming in who is not going to be a life long partner, but who will prove to be essential to her journey to fulfillment. Somehow, this relationship will help her to learn whatever she needs to learn or heal whatever she needs to heal in order to move to a higher level of experience.

The forces behind attraction are like the force of gravity: like naturally attracts like, and holes in our beings are naturally the first things to be filled as the river of time and experience washes over us. We all have deep issues that we’re not conscious of as well as desires and questions burning in our hearts, and we naturally draw into our lives the people and experiences that can help us move toward peace and fulfillment.

Further, we often mistake the soulful things we need for the people who represent them. A good example of this is the experience of transference, when someone who is seeking something profound like inner peace, happiness or healing falls in love with his therapist. The therapist represents feeling better, but in essence is just one channel through which what is needed can flow.

Something similar happens when a person symbolizes or embodies some trait or aspect we are being called to develop further ourselves. If we are drawn to someone deeply spiritual, our own inner being may be trying to get us to lean in a more spiritual direction. If we’re out of balance, we may feel strongly drawn to someone who represents the other end of the spectrum – hence the saying that opposites attract.

Attraction is energetic. When someone’s energy harmonizes well with our own, we feel like we “click.” If someone has a higher vibration than we do, it’s natural to feel drawn to them, and if someone has a lower vibration, it’s natural to feel repelled. So if being in this man’s energy field makes you feel uplifted, it’s natural for you to want to be near him.

Often we feel deeply drawn to someone because they are a soul mate � someone we’ve loved deeply in another place and time. In such cases, it’s important to remember that what we do with our loving feelings is up to us. If acting on romantic attractions would compromise our own values somehow, we can still love that person without going in a romantic direction.

Romance is a human experience: there is never a soul reason to have physical sex with someone, except for when we are destined to have a child together in order to bring a particular soul into the world. At the same time, however, there is never a soul reason NOT to have sex with someone. As long as we don’t go against our own truths and values, we are free to follow our hearts. Of course, depending on our circumstances, we are only as free as we are brave enough to break with convention.

Often this sort of situation arises as a spiritual test: Will we find the courage to honor the truth in our own hearts? Sometimes doing the right thing means one course of action, and at other times, it means something totally different. Here social rules and conventions prove to be great spiritual tools, for what we’re really doing is learning to trust our own judgment so much that we don’t need social convention to tell us what’s right anymore.

To figure out what this attraction means for you, you must first trust that there is a good reason for it. Then ask yourself what this person represents or symbolizes to you, and how he makes you feel. If this attraction was not about this individual, what might it be about for you on a deeper soul level?

I believe we’re placed in situations where we feel drawn to people and experiences that are somehow forbidden because we’re supposed to learn how to listen to and trust our own hearts. Choosing love is always the answer, but since what that means is unique to each situation, we must ask within and trust our inner knowing to guide us.

– Soul Arcanum

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Breaking Old Patterns to Manifest True Love

Filed Under: Healing, Hypnotherapy, Law of Attraction, Manifesting, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Breaking Old Patterns to Manifest True Love

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I have been in a relationship for almost four years with a man that I deeply love and thought I was going to marry. We have just recently parted ways. He lost his wife over five years ago, and it seems the longer we were together, the more his grief grew and his love for me diminished. I have sadly accepted that our relationship was not healthy, and it is better for both of us to move on separately. At times I’m relieved to be free of his depression and lack of love, but I’m devastated by his rejection and the trauma of having to quickly move from our beautiful home to a very small apartment. I have been in three relationships in my life, each time with men that were emotionally unavailable for one reason or another. I now have realized that I attract men who will ultimately reject and abandon me. I’m 46 years old. How can I stop this pattern so I can enjoy a mutually loving, emotionally supportive relationship?
Warm Regards,
Michele

Dear Michele:

As I see it, you’re already on your way to something better. You’ve become consciously aware of this pattern in your life, and by seeking deeper understanding of it, you will gain the power to break free and create positive change.

In order to move on, the first thing is to become conscious of why you tend to get involved with men who are emotionally unavailable. You may think you know why, but if you continue to end up in this same situation over and over again, there must be more that you have yet to uncover.

To unearth the buried beliefs or issues behind this pattern of experience, I highly recommend hypnotherapy. Through regression work and dialoging with your higher self, you can manifest amazing transformations in your life practically overnight. I’ve been truly amazed by the breakthroughs I’ve seen people tap into by addressing the subconscious beliefs underlying undesirable patterns of experience.

For example, some months ago I worked with a friend who had all sorts of rules about love that had been drilled into her since childhood. Her mother had married for financial security, and even though her own marriage was miserable, she’d always told her daughter to find a man with money. Despite the fact that my friend is very financially successful herself, she had major hang-ups about how much money a guy had to make in order for her to be interested in him. On a conscious level, she could see that this rule about marrying money was holding her back from finding a truly nice guy because the men she dated tended to be rich, self-centered, demanding, arrogant workaholics. Nevertheless, she believed that she couldn’t be attracted to a man who wasn’t a huge financial success.

After just three sessions in hypnotherapy, everything began to change. In addition to becoming conscious of why she kept doing what she was doing, and working through some of the fears behind this limiting pattern, she also became aware of some of the lessons she is working on this lifetime, which include finding faith in her ability to take good care of herself instead of needing a man to lean on. While she is still looking for the one, instead of feeling miserable about her love life, she is now having a fantastic time dating all sorts of kind, wonderful men.

Like my friend, we all repeat dysfunctional patterns over and over again until we heal the deep wounds and learn the big lessons that keep leading us back into those situations. Thus women who grew up in families without fathers may subconsciously pursue men who will leave them, and in this way, recreate a situation where all the pain from the past can be brought to the surface and finally healed. By consciously working through the issues involved, they empower themselves to move on to a higher level of experience.

So when we find ourselves repeating the same destructive, unfulfilling patterns over and over again, we can be sure that there is something deep within us that is driving this behavior. Usually, this isn’t something we can clearly point to on a conscious level, which is why things like hypnotherapy and spiritual counseling often prove powerful where all sorts of practical, reasonable efforts fail.

Once you’ve brought any shadows into the light and healed and released them, you just need to get into vibrational harmony with what you want. This can be trickier than it sounds, for in addition to thinking about what we want, we have to FEEL the way we want to feel. To manifest true love, we have to fall in love with love and feel just as buoyant now as we expect to feel when we’ve found the one we’re looking for.

One powerful way to shift ourselves into a higher vibration in order to manifest something that has proven tricky for us is to get soaring in every other area of our lives. So if we want to have a fabulous love relationship, we’re wise to ask ourselves if every other aspect of our lives is fabulous. If we have goals or dreams that we could be pursuing in other areas, then we’re wise to get going on those relatively easy things first.

So if you want a fabulous love relationship, ask yourself these questions: Is my house in fabulous order? Am I wonderfully successful in my career? Do I look and feel fabulous? Are my finances in terrific shape? Is my daily life in order and ready for a big, wonderful new addition?

We all have things that we want and need to do that we put off for various reasons. When there are things that we CAN do to improve our lives, and we don’t get on them, we keep ourselves from the realm of bigger dreams. When we begin to stretch ourselves by doing the things we can do to shift into a higher level of experience, then new potentials move within reach and things begin to change in exciting ways.

It’s also essential to trust that things happen for a higher reason, and to give thanks for all of our experiences. For example, when things don’t work out in one relationship, we are wise to assume that we’re meant for something better.

Once we get ourselves into a state where we feel fabulous about ourselves and all we have to offer a new lover, are totally trusting that everything happens for a good reason, and can think about love and feel buoyed by a rich sense of joy and possibility, that’s when magic happens. When we’re in this very high vibration, heaven and earth move to answer our prayers for true and lasting fulfillment.

Once you’ve prepared yourself by healing old wounds, putting your life in order, and getting into a high vibration, you just need to clearly tell the Universe what you’re looking for and remain open to doing things differently this time. This may mean that you take a different approach than you’ve ever taken before, or that you open up to dating a different type of guy than you would normally be attracted to. The point is to expand your potential, and to do that, you’ll have to open up to a broader range of possibilities.

After you tell the Universe what you want, happily embrace whatever comes your way as either the solution or a stepping stone to where you want to go. The more you can love whatever comes your way with faith that it is leading you to what you really want, the faster you’ll flow toward fulfillment, and the more fun you’ll have along the way.

Finally, we get what we give in life, so wherever you are and whomever you’re with, embody LOVE. If you give the love and affection you are hoping to get to others, big love will flow back to you.

– Soul Arcanum

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Cultivating Romantic Chemistry

Filed Under: Law of Attraction, Manifesting, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Cultivating Romantic Chemistry

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:
I have been trying to attract new love into my life using the law of attraction. Two years ago, I had a few dates with a great guy who has all the qualities I’m looking for. We could talk and laugh for hours. We went on four dates, and then I backed out because I was unable to feel sexually attracted to him and figured it would be better to stop sooner rather than later. I kept his number in my cell phone, and a couple of months ago when I seriously started praying for new love and trying to attract it into my life, I started noticing his name in my cell phone book. Every time I tried to visualize this new love, he would pop into my mind. I thought perhaps I should give it another try. We’ve now reconnected, and it’s just as easy and natural as it was before. We’re even on the same page spiritually in terms of what we’ve been up to recently. We’ve seen each other again, and it was wonderful, but I was still not physically attracted. I’m wondering what’s happening with me. Am I resisting attraction at an unconscious level because part of me is still afraid of men? (I’ve always been more attracted to men who weren’t good for me.) Am I trying to force myself into a relationship with this guy because I know he would be a wonderful partner? If I get to know him better, might I become sexually attracted to him?
S.

Dear S.:

First it’s important to note that whenever we have trouble manifesting something we think we really desire, there are usually lessons we need to learn or wounds we need to heal that are tripping us up. When it comes to finding a soul mate, there are lots of issues that can cause people to search endlessly in vain. Many people do block chemistry due to various fears; I see this all the time in my own friends and the clients I counsel. For example, I know a number of women who only want what they can’t have: they find everyone who is attracted to them to be inadequate for some reason, and always get hung up on guys who are out of their league, married, or somehow unavailable, which effectively prevents them from getting seriously involved with anyone.

Many people have deep psychic wounds that need to be healed. If women were abused, raped, shamed for being sexual or rejected in this life or another lifetime, those wounds must be healed in order for them to have a healthy, fulfilling sex life. (Women who died in childbirth in past lives often have sexual problems in future lives as well.) Similarly, men who were abused, raped, shouldered with the heavy burdens of providing for an unexpected family, unable to sexually perform, infected with an STD, or romantically rejected must also heal those wounds to find sexual fulfillment.

Deep issues aside, there are all sorts of energetic interactions constantly happening between people. These largely determine whether we feel drawn to them as well as the quality of relationship we form with them. For example, you can meet someone who seems really nice on the surface and yet feel uneasy around them because on an unconscious level, you sense that who they are pretending to be is not who they really are.

There are two issues at work here: how we are vibrating, and how we are vibrating in relationship to another individual. We have tremendous control over our own vibration, and some control over how we vibrationally relate to others.

We can cultivate passion and sensuality just like we manifest anything else in life. For example, I had a lover long ago who awakened me to a new level of sensuality. Until my experiences with him, I had been rather repressed but didn’t know it. We were amazing together, for he brought me sensually to life.

This taught me that it’s possible to bring out in lovers whatever turns us on. To awaken another, however, we must first embody the sensuality we’re hoping to find instead of looking for someone else to make it happen for us. So instead of looking for someone with whom you have good chemistry, you might try becoming more passionate and sensual yourself, focusing energetically on what you want to manifest, and setting that tone for whatever relationship you want to evoke good chemistry in. In this particular relationship, you can focus on cultivating all kinds of sensual pleasure, evoking the wonderful lover in him, and enjoying yourself no matter what.

This approach will only take us so far in particular relationships, however, just like being kind will only take us so far with certain people. If their idea of being a good friend is way off from our own, then we’re just not going to click. Similarly, if we don’t even really like someone, we won’t find them sexually attractive, or if they have sexual issues that need to be healed, they may not be ready to engage at the higher level of experience we’re longing for.

Of course, just as every combination of elements produces a different chemical reaction, there are all sorts of different chemistries between people. It’s particularly interesting to observe how new babies in a family will immediately demonstrate great rapport with some family members and show an aversion to others. No doubt this is in part due to past life experiences/karma.

Regardless how it comes to be, the chemistry between any two people is determined by the quality of the vibration of the relationship. Just as the individuals in the relationship have personal vibrations, the relationship itself has a certain feeling or tone.

Music offers us a great metaphor for understanding this better. Let’s say that everyone has an overall vibration that matches a certain note of the scale, and whenever we get together with one or more other people, we strike a chord. Clearly, there will be some combinations that sound really good and others that are discordant.

When we meet someone who shares our personal note, we feel like they are very much like us. We are kindred spirits, so we communicate and get along very well. It sounds like you and this wonderful man are very similar in nature, which is why you feel so at ease around him.

When we meet someone who has a different vibration but one that sounds really good with our own, we complement each other. The more complex but complementary a chord is, the more interesting it sounds. This is when you get a very passionate sort of bond, for you are different enough to be fascinated by each other, but at the same time, you complement each other or sound good together. Even when we are very similar to someone else, however, we can create a melody with them that is simple but moving and beautiful.

All of this is a gross oversimplification, of course, for we are all so much more than one note, and we are forever changing. This is where we have a lot of room to play at creating something beautiful. I believe that we can cultivate good chemistry with anyone we basically like, respect, and feel good around. If we are too similar, it may become sort of routine after a while, but every relationship feels like that after we’ve ironed out all the kinks – it just happens sooner rather than later when we’re highly compatible with someone. On the other hand, with someone who is too different from us, we may feel intense passion but so much conflict that it’s just not worth it.

Life is full of beautiful people and endless opportunities for passion and pleasure. To find deep fulfillment, we must become within what we seek in our outer experience, and make the most of love wherever and however we may find it.

– Soul Arcanum

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Maintaining a Strong Psychic Connection with Your Mate

Filed Under: Chakras/Auras, Energy/Vibration, Intuitive Development, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Maintaining a Strong Psychic Connection with Your Mate

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:
I’ve been married for three years. In the first years we were together, I felt very close to my husband; I felt like I could sense what he was thinking and feeling, often finished his sentences, etc. I felt like we were on the same page, so to speak. Then about four months ago, he was promoted to a new position that requires him to travel every week. (He’s home on the weekends.) I’ve noticed a dramatic shift in our relationship since this change; I just don’t feel that same sense of connection. I’m afraid we’re drifting apart on a deep, energetic level. How can we recreate and maintain that strong psychic connection we had in the beginning? Thank you so much!
Holly

Dear Holly:

When people live together, they naturally grow closer. In fact, the more time we spend with someone, the closer we grow to them. This is more than a result of our overt interactions, for we actually entrain to each others’ vibrations. This is also why it’s so powerful to spend time with a guru. A guru’s energy would be more powerful than our own, so it would raise our vibration. Similarly, when we’re in a weakened or vulnerable state, and we’re around someone who is down or depressed, they may drag us down to their level too.

When we first fall in love with someone, we are constantly building deep psychic cords with them. When we’re in their presence, we send tons of energy to them and receive the same back. We stare into their eyes, listen very intently to all they say, and send them tons of love and admiration from our hearts. We spend as much time as possible with them, and when we’re not with them, we’re usually sending out cords to them by thinking of them and feeling full of love for them, and all of this forges deep psychic bonds. When we then move in together and begin to sleep in the same bed, we spend about 1/3 of our lives basking in each others’ auras, which naturally leads to a great deal of entrainment. (Of course, having sex with someone is one of the most potent ways to form a psychic bond with them.)

Soul mates are people we forged strong loving psychic cords to in other lives. It’s like there is a rubber band connected between our hearts, and the stronger the love, the stronger and thicker that elastic band. Wherever we go, whether in this life or the afterlife, if we are separating from someone we’re strongly corded to, tension is created on that band. In this way, we are naturally drawn back together again. The same thing happens with people who hate each other, by the way: any intense emotion will create a strong cord that draws those parties back together again.

Since all of the above things deepen psychic bonds, it only makes sense that when we do the reverse – when we spend less time with someone, don’t sleep with them every night, and are caught up in lots of individual new personal activities or endeavors – we tend to feel distanced from them because we’re not feeding that psychic cord like we used to.

How to Maintain a Strong Psychic Bond with Someone at a Distance:

First I encourage you to talk to your husband about how you’re feeling. Depending on how open he is to metaphysical subjects, you may have to phrase some of what I suggest here in more mainstream terms. (For example, instead of talking about your auras and psychic connection, you might talk about your feelings and your desire to feel closer to him.) Your goal with this talk is to make a joint conscious agreement that you will both pour a lot of psychic/ emotional/ mental energy into maintaining a strong sense of connection.

My husband and I often talk about how connected (or disconnected) we feel. We’ve been together for nearly a decade now, and because we established in the beginning that we wanted to maintain the passionate connection we had early on, it has become normal for us to feel strongly linked. When we don’t, we miss it right away. As high divorce rates reveal, sustaining passionate relationships long-term takes a LOT of focus and energy; it doesn’t just happen. Many people wake up too late to this truth – like when their partner is walking out the door in frustration. If you want this relationship to prosper, you’ll both have to devote yourselves to keeping it vibrantly alive.

Though you may not be able to be together physically during the week, you can still be together mentally, emotionally and spiritually. After all, it’s only the physical body that is restricted by the laws of space and time – this is why psychics are able to peek into the future or tap into others’ energies even when they’re a world apart.

To remain metaphysically connected, you should communicate often. You might text each other throughout the day or send daily emails to each other. If you don’t know what to say, agree on a couple of things you’ll both cover, such as what stands out to you as you look back on your day, or what you’re most missing or appreciating about your partner at that time. The more you open up emotionally when communicating, the more you’ll feed your psychic bond to each other.

It would also be wise to schedule a phone call once or twice a day, perhaps first thing in the morning and then again at night before you go to bed. The key with this is not to just chat like this is some daily chore but to truly connect via the phone.

When you hang up, you might agree that as you drift off to sleep, you’ll meditate upon each other and imagine connecting in love: hugging, kissing, whatever you want to do. This will send energy to each other and also facilitate you both connecting in your dreams/on the astral plane, which will really help you stay connected. You might ask for this to happen as you fall asleep at night by setting your intention or praying for help from your guides and angels in meeting up with your partner during the night.

Surround yourselves with each others’ essence. For example, while he’s away, you could sleep in a shirt he has worn. The more it smells like him, the better. My husband wears Brut deodorant, which I love, and his shirts always smell like this. When he used to spend nights working at the fire station, I would often sleep in his shirt and breathe in his smell to feel close to him. Obviously, you want your husband to have something of yours that smells of your own essence too. (If he doesn’t want to wear it, he can just snuggle up with it, of course!)

You could also buy each other necklaces to affirm your mutual commitment to staying close. Wedding bands serve a similar function, but it will be especially powerful if you devote these articles of jewelry to creating and maintaining an extraordinary level of connection. Charge them by holding them in your joined hands. (Place his in your hands, and yours in his, and then place your hands so they’re touching.) Talk together about how you are going to keep this relationship full of passion and intimacy, and vow to each other to devote yourselves to this purpose. Then put the necklaces on each other. Every time you look at the necklaces in the mirror, touch them or think about them, remember your vow and send some loving energy to your partner.

Finally, make plans for what you’ll do together when he gets home on the weekend, and look forward to that time with a wonderful sense of anticipation. Talk about it all week long, think about it and smile, and remember: absence can make the heart grow fonder. With the right frame of mind, I think his new schedule could lead to some really passionate weekends!

– Soul Arcanum

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