A psychic told me that my aura is black. I thought this meant I was evil and bad. I am constantly attempting to connect with the world around me, for I feel disconnected and far away. I am ever trying to connect spiritually and emotionally with others through physical contact, especially lovemaking. I feel a strong need for the connection between mother and child, and I want to take care of something helpless so that it will need me. I grew up in an alcoholic home with no one to help me or reach out and hold me. I am depressed and very negative and pessimistic. This is my shield; I have to be this way in my current situation. I want to be a spiritual person, but I don’t feel like I fit in. I feel all alone. Others often mirror my moods and emotions, and I try to get near happy, peaceful people so that I can be more like them. Is this psychic vampirism? I went through a phase of cutting and vampirism in my adolescent years, and used the exchange of blood as a sexual way of getting close to people. It made me feel energized. I want to feel connected. I often feel threatened by negative energies in my home, and I think they are created by my negative moods. Can you give me advice? – Shirley
Dear Shirley:
As you are extraordinarily self-aware, I predict you’re on the verge of a major spiritual breakthrough. Before I go into your question on psychic vampirism, I urge you to examine your belief that you have to be depressed and pessimistic in order to protect yourself. Since like attracts like, true psychic protection involves turning up our inner light and focusing with faith and joy on what we desire – but that is another column.
For those who don’t know, psychic vampires are people who lack a clear, strong connection to Source, and in order to get their basic energy needs met, they try to feed on the life force energy of others. There are some fascinating scientific studies of the human energy field that demonstrate via aura photography that our auras are indeed influenced by the auras of other people. These studies have shown that in relationships where people feel good when they’re together, each individual’s aura becomes bigger and brighter while in the presence of the other person. By contrast, in negative interactions or relationships, auras constrict and grow dimmer. This corresponds with feelings of fatigue and negative emotions in the participants.
Other studies have even demonstrated that some individuals are very skilled at purposefully tapping into and feeding off of other people’s auras. Researchers can actually watch as the psychic vampire’s aura grows stronger and brighter while the victim’s aura grows dimmer.
Here are some questions you might ask yourself if you want to know if you’re a psychic vampire:
Do you generally feel better when you’re with other people as opposed to alone? Do you crave attention and love to be in the spotlight? Do others often interrupt you or abruptly end conversations with you? Do you take a very long time to explain what you want to say? Do you often complain about physical ailments or mundane problems? Are you more of a talker than a listener? Do you lean on others for help with basic life necessities, or frequently ask for favors or advice? Are you constantly disappointed in other people or situations because they don’t fulfill all your needs and desires?
If you answered yes to many of the questions above, odds are good that you are trying to get some of your life force energy needs met by trying to grab and hold other people’s attention.
The fact that you grew up in an alcoholic household fits the picture as well. Most psychic vampires have at least one parent who was also a psychic vampire. Since children have much stronger needs for care and energy than adults, when they are leaned on heavily by a parent or grow up in dysfunctional households, they may never get a chance to develop a healthy energy system. It may also be that you simply learned to seek energy in other people from your parents – that they leaned on others for energy so you learned that this is normal.
It’s well known that the children of alcoholics often become codependent.
Please research this and get some therapy to resolve these core issues. What you really need is not another person to need you, but rather to heal some deep abandonment wounds from the past, and learn how to love and respect yourself the way you long to be loved and respected by others. I highly recommend hypnotherapy to address the limiting subconscious beliefs you picked up in childhood (and perhaps in past lives), and to heal your depression and cultivate well-being from within.
Since you mentioned negative energies in your home, it’s important to note that sometimes people become psychic vampires to compensate for their own energy being drained by another person or an astral entity. Unresolved issues from the past (including past lives) can also be very draining, so I again recommend hypnotherapy or energy healing work to check out those possibilities.
In any case, you can break this cycle by developing the healthy connection to Source that you never got a chance to develop as a child. If you tap into the Divine, you’ll find an infinite supply of energy available to you; by contrast, trying to meet our energy needs through other people is exhausting in and of itself, and never truly satisfying.
First you must make a firm decision that you will no longer continue in this pattern. Instead, you’ll receive all the energy you need in healthy ways: from the earth, the air you breathe, the food you eat, and Divine Source. Affirm that your supply is infinite, and that all you have to do is open to the Divine to feel recharged and renewed.
In addition to taking good care of yourself by getting enough sleep, exercise, healthy food and restful sleep, I highly recommend you take up something like yoga or tai chi to get the energy flowing freely through your system, and also meditate to connect to Source energy.
To begin to draw all the energy you need through daily spiritual practice, I recommend you work with my Chakra Clearing and Charging Meditation. At the end of that meditation, your root chakra will be open, charged and clear. Visualize red energy flowing up from the earth into your root chakra as well as into the soles of your feet. Feel the earth energy charging your whole being with power, health, strength, vitality and well-being. Feel this energy swirling throughout your whole being, and going wherever it needs to go and becoming whatever it needs to become to keep you feeling strong, healthy, and centered in your personal power.
Next focus on your crown chakra and visualize white light pouring into your crown from Source. See it flowing through all of your being, filling you with peace, well-being, energy and vitality. See it swirling throughout your being, going wherever you need it to go in order to feel calm, peaceful and centered. Notice how it is crystalline and opalescent: it shines with all the colors of the rainbow, so as it flows throughout your being, it can become whatever you need it to be.
If you practice this meditation every morning and whenever you feel drained, tired, or in need of more energy, and you also follow up on my other suggestions, I have faith that very soon, you’ll feel like a brand new person.
– Soul Arcanum