Tag Archive: divorce


Can Spiritual Growth Lead to Divorce?

Filed Under: Relationships, Spiritual Growth by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Can Spiritual Growth Lead to Divorce?


Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

Does our life partner change as we grow and develop on our path? As we become more spiritual, does God sometimes feel that we are ready for another partner, and is that why some marriages break? Thanks and warm regards to you!

Kiran

Dear Kiran:

I do see a strong relationship between spiritual growth and divorce. While spiritual growth can lead to incompatibility in relationships, the end of big relationships can also spark new spiritual growth. Of course, people can also avoid personal growth by bailing out of marriage or by resisting the end of an obsolete relationship.

Over the years, I’ve watched many new spiritual seekers experience upheaval in every area of their lives, and I went through something like this myself when first awakening. This is such a common phenomenon that there is even a word for it: “spiritual emergency.” It generally occurs when a person first awakens to a conscious spiritual path and begins to seek a more expanded way of being and deeper sense of meaning in their lives.

In this newly awakened state, people begin to question pretty much everything, such as who they have assumed themselves to be, what they’ve believed to be right and true, and many of the decisions they made in the past, including whether and whom to marry. As they search for an extraordinary level of experience, they have a tendency to break free of conventional occupations, lifestyles and situations.

This is all in the name of living a more authentic life. Most people go to school, pursue certain careers, get married and “settle down” simply because this is what everyone else seems to be doing. When a person awakens from this reverie, they begin to live in a more conscious manner, which naturally leads them to abandon much of what has already been established.

However, there is some danger in ascribing our feelings of attraction for others to some divine plan. Though I sense this is not what you want to hear, in my experience, when spiritual growth is behind the dissolution of a marriage, there is no third party involved. If spiritual growth is the driving force behind a divorce, a person will leave the marriage for their own true selves, not for someone else.

While it’s possible to have spiritual growth be the main cause of divorce and for there to be a lover (or potential lover) waiting in the wings, it’s generally wise to make sure that the reason for ending a marriage is not this other person. I’m even going to go out on a big limb and suggest that it’s never a good idea to leave one person for another. Statistics support me in this, for research indicates that when a person leaves a spouse to pursue a relationship with a third party, that second relationship is twice as likely to fall apart as the relationship that was ended.

Further, people who end a marriage for someone else are the most likely to regret getting divorced. This is because the divorce was not caused by spiritual growth but a desire to avoid something and unfounded assumptions. Since all relationships are important, if we’ve already made a sacred vow to someone, I believe we owe it to everyone involved to base our decisions about that relationship on the relationship itself instead of our hopes or feelings for some third party.

It is true that spiritual growth can make us incompatible with someone we used to be in harmony with. While both partners can simply grow in different directions, usually one partner awakens before the other. This can create tension, especially if partners put pressure on each other to be more like them. The loneliness of feeling unaccepted and misunderstood can lead one or both partners to search for kindred spirits, which can lead to all sorts of confusion and complications.

Since like does attract like, we are naturally attracted to people who are of a similar vibration. We are also naturally drawn toward people to whom we already have a deep spiritual bond due to other/past life experiences. This pull doesn’t necessarily mean that being with them will make us happy, however – it just means we have something to gain from interacting with them.

People often feel irresistibly drawn toward each other and end up having a tumultuous sort of relationship because big karma drew them back together. Instead of happily ever after, what they get is a whole new set of challenges. In my reading work, I often see love affairs as destined connections that aren’t meant to be permanent but are instead designed to help individuals reconnect with who they really are and what they really want. As such, they involve strong feelings of attraction, but are only meant to be temporary bridges between what has been and a more authentic future. It is foolish to expect such attractions to fulfill all our dreams for love or to allow them to affect how we feel about the other people in our lives.

For what it’s worth, I think the high divorce rate is a natural sign of the times, for life on Earth has changed dramatically since the invention of marriage. Where we used to struggle to physically survive, we now have the luxury of pursuing emotional fulfillment and spiritual growth. The pace of life has also increased dramatically, and we’ve all gained an incredible amount of freedom. Where we used to live in one place our whole lives and have few choices in terms of mates, we can now travel around the world and connect with anyone on the planet with the help of the internet.

As a result of all of these changes, people are living the equivalent of several lifetimes’ worth of experiences in just one incarnation, which means they are growing and changing at a faster rate than ever before. Given this new pace, it just makes sense that we may need several lifetimes’ worth of relationships in order to keep making progress.

I’m not suggesting we abandon marriage whenever the impulse strikes us – far from it. To determine the value of a relationship, we must ask ourselves if it is based on love or fear. If people stay together because they’re worried about how others will react if they split up, they are staying together out of fear. One might argue that they are staying together out of love for those other people, but the bottom line is that they are afraid of what will happen if they listen to their hearts. When we do anything from fear, it will eventually break down and lead us back to make a new decision.

Though we might be able to physically force people to stay together, love can’t be legislated, and hearts can’t be bound by spoken words or written contracts. We should stay with someone because we love them and want to be with them, for this the only sort of relationship that proves to be truly happy for everyone involved.

Though we tend to view the choice to divorce in a negative light, from a higher spiritual perspective, it’s more like a graduation from one phase of life and the launch of a fresh new beginning. We don’t condemn someone who has long been miserable in a particular career when they finally quit that job to pursue their dreams; we celebrate their courage and their determination to live a fuller, more rewarding life. With the right perspective, the end of a marriage can similarly be celebrated as a tremendous opportunity to expand and enrich our lives. For more on how divorce can be a positive spiritual experience, I recommend the book Spiritual Divorce: Divorce as a Catalyst for an Extraordinary Life by Debbie Ford.

Soul Arcanum

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Divorce Sparks Intuitive Awakening

Filed Under: Intuitive Development, Psychic Ability, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Divorce Sparks Intuitive Awakening

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I think that someone has cast a witchcraft spell on me and my children, and feel it may be my estranged husband or his lover. Yesterday I suddenly felt a cold unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. Our home is warm and there was no reason for this extreme coldness. My husband came over about 20 minutes after this, and this feeling came over me. There was then tension and disruption from my son, who had been perfectly sweet for weeks until then. Tonight when my husband arrived, the same coldness came over me, and tension filled the air. He is a very angry, selfish person, and I wonder if he might have a dark entity or dark spirit attached to him. Before I found out about his affair, I had a vivid dream of tiny gremlins running up my bed onto my hand and trying to pull my wedding ring off. I wrestled with them in my dream, and it was so vivid that I awoke holding onto my hand, covering my rings and crying for help. About a year later, I felt a soft energy leave my ring one day, and it felt like the blessings that had been placed on the ring on our wedding day were evaporating. I actually felt the energy of our vows go from the ring. What do you make of all of this?
– Soul Arcanum

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I found what you wrote about your wedding ring to be really interesting, for it reminded me of an amazing experience I had years ago when my own marriage was unraveling. At the time of this event, I was sitting in a college class, thinking deeply about my marriage. Silently, I asked God if my marriage would or could make it, and at that moment, I felt drawn to look down at my rings. To my surprise, I saw that one of the main emeralds in my engagement ring was missing; the setting was empty in that spot.

I thought this was the sign I was looking for, but I wasn’t totally convinced. I couldn’t remember the last time I had really looked at my rings, so I told myself that this stone could have been missing for a while. When I got home that night, I gave the engagement ring to my husband to take to the jeweler, so I was only wearing my wedding band after this.

While in that same class the following week, I remembered what had happened, and I decided to ask the same question again in hopes of receiving another sign. I never expected it to come to me through my rings again, so I spent a number of minutes looking around and listening to people in the class for a sign before I noticed that my wedding band was split in two. It remained on my finger without a problem, but when I really looked at it, I saw that there was a crack completely through it on one side. I knew this was new because I had just carefully examined my rings when I discovered the emerald missing. This convinced me! As you have probably surmised, the marriage didn’t make it, but it’s now ten years later and I’m very happily remarried, so it all worked out.

I think this story illustrates not only how asking for a sign can yield amazing results, but also how objects like wedding rings can and do hold energy. We imbue them with that energy when we bless and consecrate them as symbols of something we hold sacred, and they can reflect what they represent in some amazing ways. So I don’t doubt that you did indeed feel the energy of your vows evaporating from your ring that day.

I also found your dream about the gremlins fascinating, and I see two possible interpretations here. First, the dream may have been a literal reflection of something happening in the astral. In other words, maybe there really were astral entities at work in this situation, perhaps stirring up lust in your husband (his weak spot), and thus damaging your marriage. However, it’s also possible that your own inner being was trying to warn you about what was going on, and because you didn’t want to face the truth, it gave you this gremlin metaphor to try to warn you that something was tearing your marriage apart.

As for the other things you’re sensing, I have to say that it’s normal for there to be psychic/emotional tension when people are divorcing, and it’s common for kids to act out in response to that tension and their own emotional turmoil. At the same time, however, it’s clear that you are highly psychically sensitive.

Because you are so sensitive, you will be affected by everyday emotional tension more than most people, but you’ll also pick up on subtle energies and intuitive warnings. Further, there doesn’t have to be an overt spell cast on you for you to experience the things you’ve described. Some of these sensations are your intuition trying to tell you things to help you, and one of those things may indeed be that someone is sending ill will your way. We may experience this as cold, pain or tingling, or we may find that person frequently pops into our minds for no apparent reason.

It’s also highly possible that your ex does have a negative entity attached to him, which can also feel like the coldest cold. Many people have negative entities attached to them and never realize it. Certainly anyone who is in emotional turmoil or lacks emotional control is a prime candidate, as is anyone who is really “angry and selfish.” Negative emotions like stress, rage, grief, and jealousy make us vulnerable to attachment and big targets for these entities, so people who are going through divorce, grieving, or suffering any other major life crisis often struggle with lower astral entities.

It’s wise to make peace with everyone in our lives for lots of reasons, and the potential for psychic attack is a big one. When we harbor anger or resentment for others, we damage our own happiness, drain our own energy, and waste our time wishing others ill when we could be out fulfilling our dreams. At the same time, when people harbor resentment toward US, if we are not consciously cultivating well-being, it can affect us. (It will affect them adversely even more in the long run, but often people who are really ticked off don’t care as long as they get revenge.)

Besides, most people have no idea that by brooding over something that someone said or did, they are sending that person negative energy and potentially harming that person as well as themselves. (Remember: we get what we give, and whatever we focus upon expands in our lives.) Heck, most people don’t seem to realize that they can have control over their own thoughts and feelings – they think they just happen to them.

In light of all of this, I recommend you let go of the idea that a spell has been cast on you, and cultivate well-being in the following ways:

1) Thank your intuition and learn to work with it and trust it. You are highly psychic, and are receiving lots of warnings, information and insights designed to help you.

2) Make peace with your ex-husband and his mistress. Assume that they deserve each other, and that you must deserve better. I’d look upon this as a blessing, for you’ve been set free from marriage to a mean, selfish man, and can now move on to new and higher love.

3) Wish everyone well. Love yourself and take good care of yourself and your children. Wish your ex, his new lover, and everyone you know all the blessings you desire for yourself. Cultivate love, peace, good will and happiness. Then even if others try to send cold shadows to disturb you, your bright inner light will keep those shadows at bay.

– Soul Arcanum

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Divorce Sparks Intuitive Awakening

Filed Under: Relationships, Spiritual Growth by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Divorce Sparks Intuitive Awakening

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I think that someone has cast a witchcraft spell on me and my children, and feel it may be my estranged husband or his lover. Yesterday I suddenly felt a cold unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. Our home is warm and there was no reason for this extreme coldness. My husband came over about 20 minutes after this, and this feeling came over me. There was then tension and disruption from my son, who had been perfectly sweet for weeks until then. Tonight when my husband arrived, the same coldness came over me, and tension filled the air. He is a very angry, selfish person, and I wonder if he might have a dark entity or dark spirit attached to him. Before I found out about his affair, I had a vivid dream of tiny gremlins running up my bed onto my hand and trying to pull my wedding ring off. I wrestled with them in my dream, and it was so vivid that I awoke holding onto my hand, covering my rings and crying for help. About a year later, I felt a soft energy leave my ring one day, and it felt like the blessings that had been placed on the ring on our wedding day were evaporating. I actually felt the energy of our vows go from the ring. What do you make of all of this?
– Soul Arcanum

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I found what you wrote about your wedding ring to be really interesting, for it reminded me of an amazing experience I had years ago when my own marriage was unraveling. At the time of this event, I was sitting in a college class, thinking deeply about my marriage. Silently, I asked God if my marriage would or could make it, and at that moment, I felt drawn to look down at my rings. To my surprise, I saw that one of the main emeralds in my engagement ring was missing; the setting was empty in that spot.

I thought this was the sign I was looking for, but I wasn’t totally convinced. I couldn’t remember the last time I had really looked at my rings, so I told myself that this stone could have been missing for a while. When I got home that night, I gave the engagement ring to my husband to take to the jeweler, so I was only wearing my wedding band after this.

While in that same class the following week, I remembered what had happened, and I decided to ask the same question again in hopes of receiving another sign. I never expected it to come to me through my rings again, so I spent a number of minutes looking around and listening to people in the class for a sign before I noticed that my wedding band was split in two. It remained on my finger without a problem, but when I really looked at it, I saw that there was a crack completely through it on one side. I knew this was new because I had just carefully examined my rings when I discovered the emerald missing. This convinced me! As you have probably surmised, the marriage didn’t make it, but it’s now ten years later and I’m very happily remarried, so it all worked out.

I think this story illustrates not only how asking for a sign can yield amazing results, but also how objects like wedding rings can and do hold energy. We imbue them with that energy when we bless and consecrate them as symbols of something we hold sacred, and they can reflect what they represent in some amazing ways. So I don’t doubt that you did indeed feel the energy of your vows evaporating from your ring that day.

I also found your dream about the gremlins fascinating, and I see two possible interpretations here. First, the dream may have been a literal reflection of something happening in the astral. In other words, maybe there really were astral entities at work in this situation, perhaps stirring up lust in your husband (his weak spot), and thus damaging your marriage. However, it’s also possible that your own inner being was trying to warn you about what was going on, and because you didn’t want to face the truth, it gave you this gremlin metaphor to try to warn you that something was tearing your marriage apart.

As for the other things you’re sensing, I have to say that it’s normal for there to be psychic/emotional tension when people are divorcing, and it’s common for kids to act out in response to that tension and their own emotional turmoil. At the same time, however, it’s clear that you are highly psychically sensitive.

Because you are so sensitive, you will be affected by everyday emotional tension more than most people, but you’ll also pick up on subtle energies and intuitive warnings. Further, there doesn’t have to be an overt spell cast on you for you to experience the things you’ve described. Some of these sensations are your intuition trying to tell you things to help you, and one of those things may indeed be that someone is sending ill will your way. We may experience this as cold, pain or tingling, or we may find that person frequently pops into our minds for no apparent reason.

It’s also highly possible that your ex does have a negative entity attached to him, which can also feel like the coldest cold. Many people have negative entities attached to them and never realize it. Certainly anyone who is in emotional turmoil or lacks emotional control is a prime candidate, as is anyone who is really “angry and selfish.” Negative emotions like stress, rage, grief, and jealousy make us vulnerable to attachment and big targets for these entities, so people who are going through divorce, grieving, or suffering any other major life crisis often struggle with lower astral entities.

It’s wise to make peace with everyone in our lives for lots of reasons, and the potential for psychic attack is a big one. When we harbor anger or resentment for others, we damage our own happiness, drain our own energy, and waste our time wishing others ill when we could be out fulfilling our dreams. At the same time, when people harbor resentment toward US, if we are not consciously cultivating well-being, it can affect us. (It will affect them adversely even more in the long run, but often people who are really ticked off don’t care as long as they get revenge.)

Besides, most people have no idea that by brooding over something that someone said or did, they are sending that person negative energy and potentially harming that person as well as themselves. (Remember: we get what we give, and whatever we focus upon expands in our lives.) Heck, most people don’t seem to realize that they can have control over their own thoughts and feelings – they think they just happen to them.

In light of all of this, I recommend you let go of the idea that a spell has been cast on you, and cultivate well-being in the following ways:

  1. Thank your intuition and learn to work with it and trust it. You are highly psychic, and are receiving lots of warnings, information and insights designed to help you.
  2. Make peace with your ex-husband and his mistress. Assume that they deserve each other, and that you must deserve better. I’d look upon this as a blessing, for you’ve been set free from marriage to a mean, selfish man, and can now move on to new and higher love.
  3. Wish everyone well. Love yourself and take good care of yourself and your children. Wish your ex, his new lover, and everyone you know all the blessings you desire for yourself. Cultivate love, peace, good will and happiness. Then even if others try to send cold shadows to disturb you, your bright inner light will keep those shadows at bay.

– Soul Arcanum

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