Category: Healing


How to Handle Heavy Past Life Memories

Filed Under: Healing, Hypnotherapy, Karma, Past Lives, Reincarnation by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on How to Handle Heavy Past Life Memories

 

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I had a dream about my mother-in-law. It was set in the 1800’s; I could tell by the clothes we were wearing. It was very vivid, in full color. My mother-in-law was my mother, and she was trying to kill me because I had lost my virginity before marriage. As it turns out, I killed her in self-defense. I’m wondering if this is truly a past life experience – a message from spirit that my mother-in-law was indeed my mother in a past life. Are we together in this life to make up for my karma in the past? Do I tell her about my dream or will she think I’m crazy? What do I do with this dream? My birth date is 8/5/1970.
Katrina

Dear Katrina:

Your dream certainly sounds like the memory of a past life experience, since it’s set in another time period and involved people from your current life who were different people in the dream. Even more important, however, is your intuitive feeling about it. Of course, to access confirmation, more information, and/or healing of the issues involved, you could always pursue past life regression with a hypnotherapist.

Let’s work under the assumption that this is indeed a dream about a past life experience. Since souls tend to reincarnate in the same groups over and over again, it makes perfect sense that your mother in a past life would have a close relationship with you in this one.

Both our best and our worst relationships tend to be deeply karmic in nature. Since we learn the most from big challenges, when relationships are really difficult, we are wise to ask ourselves what we are learning as a result of that person being in our life.

I’d like to share with you a similar situation of my own. I knew the first time I laid eyes on my husband that he was part of my soul family and was destined to be important in my future. Months later, I also immediately recognized his ex-wife upon first meeting her. (She seemed to recognize me on some level too, as she was markedly unfriendly.)

My husband and his ex used to have a very antagonistic relationship, but I was determined to turn all of that around. Sadly, she didn’t seem to have any interest in having a harmonious relationship with either one of us, and no matter what I did, things always seemed to fall apart.

When I meditated on the situation, to my surprise, I remembered a past life in which his ex and I had been sisters. In that lifetime, he had begun to court her, which thrilled her because he was a really good catch. The first time he came to our house, however, I opened the door and the sparks flew. (We already had a soul mate bond when we met in that lifetime.) To make a long story short, he switched his attentions from my older sister to me, and my sister never forgave me.

After remembering this, it was easy to see why I wanted so badly for things to be good between us, and why she may have had animosity from the start. We’ve finally made peace, but this relationship still seems more important to me than it is to her. This may be because spiritual growth is more important to me in general, or it may be that in remembering that past life, I reawakened all the guilt and angst from that time for myself, so I’m highly motivated to resolve the karma and feelings involved.

Since we forget our past lives so that we can test ourselves to see if we have really learned the lessons involved, we often remember them when we finally master those lessons. I’m betting that close to the time of this dream, you achieved some sort of epiphany or spiritual breakthrough that relates to this lesson. With a bit of contemplation, I bet you can determine the dynamic or event in your relationship with your mother-in-law that triggered this memory.

As you contemplate this, you might ask yourself what you’ve learned or are learning as a result of having her in your life. For example, from the tumultuous relationship I described above, I’ve learned that we can only do our own best to create love and harmony: No matter how badly we may want to create greater love with someone, if the other person doesn’t want it, we have to respect that.

I’ve also learned that we don’t need the other person’s cooperation to heal our own souls and set ourselves free from karma. In fact, it’s normal for one person to be more motivated to work things out than the other person is, so we must focus on our own personal issues in relationships.

If you get hung up on the quality of the relationship itself, it can be very frustrating to try to create peace with old enemies since most people try to avoid those connections as much as possible. This is essentially the difference between one who is on a conscious spiritual path and everyone else: people who are motivated by fear tend to bury big issues and avoid emotional pain, while people who are motivated by love are eager to bring to light anything standing in the way of greater harmony.

Everyone comes to healing in their own time and way, and it’s not for us to decide what others should do or desire. For this reason, we must listen to our inner guidance and honor it. Then if we do feel called to make some effort, we’re wise to do so without attachment to receiving a particular outcome or response. If you can get into a vibration where you can remain kind and peaceful whether your efforts to create love and forgiveness are well-received or rejected, you will free yourself no matter what anyone else chooses to do.

You don’t have to do anything overt to heal yourself from the past; what’s important is what happens inside of you. Can you have compassion for yourself and all that you were up against? Can you also find compassion for her and recognize how stressed she must have been to act as she did? When you fully integrate the lessons this relationship is teaching you, and you forgive yourself and everyone else involved, you will be free.

Finally, our point of power is right now, so resolving past karma isn’t as important as creating good karma today. Instead of getting hung up on the past, I recommend you focus on making your current relationship as good as it can be. If she remains antagonistic, you can always send love to her in your heart and mind without needing any particular response in return.

In summary, ask your own inner guidance how to best make peace with the past, and act on the intuitions you receive. At the same time, strive to create loving relationships with everyone in your life right now. This will not only lift you above old karma, it will empower you to soar to new heights of health, happiness, personal power and prosperity in this lifetime, and align you with wonderful spirit family reunions in all your lives to come.

– Soul Arcanum

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Haunted by Fatal Accident

Filed Under: Healing, Hypnotherapy, Spirit Communication, Spirits by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Haunted by Fatal Accident

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I was involved in a car accident eight years ago. The drunk man who hit me was 32 years old; he died at the scene. I am actively seeing a therapist and have been diagnosed with PTSD, but have always felt this man as a lingering presence in my life. I have been left with anxiety and remorse that I can’t shake even though the accident wasn’t my fault. I feel this lost spirit has attached himself to me and is draining me of my energy and truth. I have even tried to not believe in this to make it go away, but I can’t deny my truth anymore. I am an intuitive person and feel this to be the root of my problems. My date of birth is 4/22/79.
Kellie

Dear Kellie:

First and foremost, it is essential to your well-being and peace of mind to trust yourself. I know that the idea of spirit attachment is by no means mainstream, but that doesn’t mean it’s invalid. Further, whether one believes in spirit attachment or not, innumerable cases demonstrate that spirit releasement therapy can instantly resolve longstanding physical, emotional and mental problems. Usually, people have tried everything that modern medicine has to offer before they open up to the possibility of spirit attachment, so they are astounded when spirit releasement yields fast, dramatic results.

You describe a number of factors that support the idea that this man is indeed attached to you and influencing how you feel. Most important is your own feeling that this is what is going on. The best instrument for detecting this sort of phenomenon is one’s own intuition, and yours is very clearly trying to make you aware of the true nature of your problems. I urge you to listen to your own inner knowing and trust your ability to sense the truth.

In addition to your intuition, it’s helpful to realize that this sort of thing happens all the time. When a person dies a sudden, violent death, the odds of that person remaining earthbound on the other side rise dramatically. At first these spirits may not realize that they have died at all; one minute they are driving along, and the next, they’re walking through a very strange dreamworld. When someone who is inebriated dies a sudden violent death, the chances that they will end up disoriented on the other side are even greater.

When we add remorse to the mix, we even have a reason why a spirit who wasn’t necessarily disoriented may choose to hang around. Given your feelings of remorse and anxiety, odds are good that this spirit is aware of what happened and is so overcome with remorse that he is hanging around to try to find a way to make things up to you.

Knowing this should make it easier to forgive him if you haven’t yet, which will encourage him to move on. If you have forgiven him, then it’s important that he know and feel this. I doubt very much that he realizes that he’s harming you by endlessly trying to apologize or make things right. Once he knows he has been forgiven and that the best thing he can do for you is to let go, I imagine he’ll be amenable to moving on.

There is a book you may find interesting entitled A Change of Heart by Claire Slyvia. While the book is mainly about the attachment of a spirit via organ transplant, the author’s descriptions of how she became aware of the spirit’s presence and the ways this attachment made her feel like she wasn’t herself are similar to your own experiences.

For more on spirit releasement therapy, you might check out spiritrelease.org and spiritrelease.com. You may also be interested in this article, which links PTSD with spirit attachment: PTSD: An Alternate View.

For releasing the spirit, you have three basic options:

Personal/Ritualistic: You can try to release this spirit yourself. Since it seems this is a well-intentioned spirit, you shouldn’t encounter too much resistance from him. You might begin by simply communicating with him (out loud) that you are aware of his presence, and explain how he is negatively affecting you. Tell him that he died in the accident in case he doesn’t know, and communicate (with feeling) that you forgive him and want to move on. Communicate that it is best for him to move on as well – that both of you will benefit from this. Send him lots of love and understanding, and perhaps communicate that in losing his life in that accident, he more than paid for his poor judgment. Encourage him to forgive himself and look for the light or for angelic guides/helpers. Pray for help from the Spirit world and visualize him being guided in crossing over. There are also set rituals for this sort of thing that you may find in books or on the internet; trust your intuition to guide you to the best way for you.

Spiritual/Intuitive: You can visit a psychic/medium who is experienced with helping spirits cross over. I recommend finding a Spiritualist church and asking the minister there for advice. Many people who can perceive and communicate with spirits are able to talk them through the process of letting go and moving on. (This is what the main character on the TV show The Ghost Whisperer does.)

Secular/Interactive: In my opinion, this is the most reliable, powerful and thorough approach. You’ll want to find a hypnotherapist who has training and experience in spirit releasement therapy. The therapist will guide you into a deep trance state and dialogue with your subconscious mind/higher self regarding the true nature of your problems. If this spirit is attached to you, at this time it will be able to speak to the therapist through you, and the therapist can then guide the spirit in moving on. A good therapist will also help you begin to heal from all of this so that you can feel as good as new again.

After this spirit has been released, you may need further healing. It’s likely that this spirit attached to you at the scene of the accident, and your own healing from this traumatic experience may have been arrested or impeded by this attachment. Spiritual/energy healing can be very helpful here, as can prayer and meditation. Remember that your guides and angels are always standing by, ready to lend a hand. If you pray to them for the healing, answers and solutions you need, and you trust your intuition, you will be guided to whatever is right and best for you.

– Soul Arcanum

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Haunted by Fatal Accident

Filed Under: Healing, Hypnotherapy, Spirits by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Haunted by Fatal Accident

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

I was involved in a car accident eight years ago. The drunk man who hit me was 32 years old; he died at the scene. I am actively seeing a therapist and have been diagnosed with PTSD, but have always felt this man as a lingering presence in my life. I have been left with anxiety and remorse that I can’t shake even though the accident wasn’t my fault. I feel this lost spirit has attached himself to me and is draining me of my energy and truth. I have even tried to not believe in this to make it go away, but I can’t deny my truth anymore. I am an intuitive person and feel this to be the root of my problems. My date of birth is 4/22/79.
Kellie

Dear Kellie:

First and foremost, it is essential to your well-being and peace of mind to trust yourself. I know that the idea of spirit attachment is by no means mainstream, but that doesn’t mean it’s invalid. Further, whether one believes in spirit attachment or not, innumerable cases demonstrate that spirit releasement therapy can instantly resolve longstanding physical, emotional and mental problems. Usually, people have tried everything that modern medicine has to offer before they open up to the possibility of spirit attachment, so they are astounded when spirit releasement yields fast, dramatic results.

You describe a number of factors that support the idea that this man is indeed attached to you and influencing how you feel. Most important is your own feeling that this is what is going on. The best instrument for detecting this sort of phenomenon is one’s own intuition, and yours is very clearly trying to make you aware of the true nature of your problems. I urge you to listen to your own inner knowing and trust your ability to sense the truth.

In addition to your intuition, it’s helpful to realize that this sort of thing happens all the time. When a person dies a sudden, violent death, the odds of that person remaining earthbound on the other side rise dramatically. At first these spirits may not realize that they have died at all; one minute they are driving along, and the next, they’re walking through a very strange dreamworld. When someone who is inebriated dies a sudden violent death, the chances that they will end up disoriented on the other side are even greater.

When we add remorse to the mix, we even have a reason why a spirit who wasn’t necessarily disoriented may choose to hang around. Given your feelings of remorse and anxiety, odds are good that this spirit is aware of what happened and is so overcome with remorse that he is hanging around to try to find a way to make things up to you.

Knowing this should make it easier to forgive him if you haven’t yet, which will encourage him to move on. If you have forgiven him, then it’s important that he know and feel this. I doubt very much that he realizes that he’s harming you by endlessly trying to apologize or make things right. Once he knows he has been forgiven and that the best thing he can do for you is to let go, I imagine he’ll be amenable to moving on.

There is a book you may find interesting entitled A Change of Heart by Claire Slyvia. While the book is mainly about the attachment of a spirit via organ transplant, the author’s descriptions of how she became aware of the spirit’s presence and the ways this attachment made her feel like she wasn’t herself are similar to your own experiences.

For more on spirit releasement therapy, you might check out spiritrelease.org and spiritrelease.com. You may also be interested in this article, which links PTSD with spirit attachment: PTSD: An Alternate View.

For releasing the spirit, you have three basic options:

Personal/Ritualistic: You can try to release this spirit yourself. Since it seems this is a well-intentioned spirit, you shouldn’t encounter too much resistance from him. You might begin by simply communicating with him (out loud) that you are aware of his presence, and explain how he is negatively affecting you. Tell him that he died in the accident in case he doesn’t know, and communicate (with feeling) that you forgive him and want to move on. Communicate that it is best for him to move on as well – that both of you will benefit from this. Send him lots of love and understanding, and perhaps communicate that in losing his life in that accident, he more than paid for his poor judgment. Encourage him to forgive himself and look for the light or for angelic guides/helpers. Pray for help from the Spirit world and visualize him being guided in crossing over. There are also set rituals for this sort of thing that you may find in books or on the internet; trust your intuition to guide you to the best way for you.

Spiritual/Intuitive: You can visit a psychic/medium who is experienced with helping spirits cross over. I recommend finding a Spiritualist church and asking the minister there for advice. Many people who can perceive and communicate with spirits are able to talk them through the process of letting go and moving on. (This is what the main character on the TV show The Ghost Whisperer does.)

Secular/Interactive: In my opinion, this is the most reliable, powerful and thorough approach. You’ll want to find a hypnotherapist who has training and experience in spirit releasement therapy. The therapist will guide you into a deep trance state and dialogue with your subconscious mind/higher self regarding the true nature of your problems. If this spirit is attached to you, at this time it will be able to speak to the therapist through you, and the therapist can then guide the spirit in moving on. A good therapist will also help you begin to heal from all of this so that you can feel as good as new again.

After this spirit has been released, you may need further healing. It’s likely that this spirit attached to you at the scene of the accident, and your own healing from this traumatic experience may have been arrested or impeded by this attachment. Spiritual/energy healing can be very helpful here, as can prayer and meditation. Remember that your guides and angels are always standing by, ready to lend a hand. If you pray to them for the healing, answers and solutions you need, and you trust your intuition, you will be guided to whatever is right and best for you.

– Soul Arcanum

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Still Seeking Peace with Parents’ Deaths

Filed Under: Afterlife, Death and Dying, Destiny/Higher Plan, Dreams, Healing by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Still Seeking Peace with Parents’ Deaths

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:

My mother died of cancer and about one year later, my dad committed suicide. My mother knew she was going to die so she had special talks with all her children. In my conversation with her, I asked her to please find a way to come visit me in my dreams or some other way from the dead. She said she would. I only had one dream about her. I was sitting at my kitchen table with a couple of friends and she appeared in the doorway. I turned and yelled Mom! and went to get up to hug her and she disappeared. As for my father, he died of a drug overdose. In the only dream I had about him, he was chasing me with a drug needle, saying This is your life now. Please help me understand all of this. Why won’t my mom won’t come to see me and talk to me like in the stories I’ve read at Soul Arcanum? Why would my dad say and do the things he did to me in my dream? I stood by both my parents until the end, never missing a doctor’s appointment or a chance to get my dad help for his pain. All he did when he was alive was make my life a living hell and make up rumors about me to feed his drug habit. Please help me. Thanks in advance!
Karen

Dear Karen:

Since it seems your parents were very different people and you had unique relationships with each of them, I think we should approach these dreams separately.

First it’s important to recognize and give thanks that your mother did come to you as promised. It may not have been exactly what you were hoping for, but she did show up in a dream and try to connect with you, and you did remember the experience.

My dad died a couple of years ago, after he and my mother had enjoyed many decades of a really beautiful marriage. One would think that she would have had all sorts of experiences with my dad after he passed, but she hasn’t had a single one that I would call really obvious or moving. She says that she sometimes hears his voice in her head, telling her what she should do about this or that problem, and that a couple of times, she has gotten the feeling that a bird outside the window was a sign from him, but she’s not had any vivid visits from him either when awake or dreaming.

I, however, have had outright visits, dreams, signs – you name it – from my dad. He even telephoned me on my birthday! This is not because he loved me more than he loved her or the rest of the family. Spirit communication is a two-way street, and there are many factors that can influence its success.

Following are some things to consider that may be affecting this situation:

First, people who die after long illnesses often need some time to heal and recover on the other side. They may make an all-out effort to come to us at least once after they’ve died to let us know they’re okay or to fulfill a promise, like your mother did, but then move on to what they need to do next. Often it’s a good sign when spirits don’t endlessly visit us, for it means they’ve moved on and are doing what they need to be doing on the other side.

It can take a great deal of time and effort for spirits to reach us in a way that most people can perceive it. It’s much like learning how to consciously communicate with spirits is for us: we could devote all kinds of time and energy to this goal and still find the results we desire elusive. In other words, I think we should assume that inter-dimensional communication is just as tricky to affect from the spirit world as it is from the physical.

Our state of mind definitely affects spirit communication. You have obviously gone through a great deal with all of this. You didn’t mention how long it has been since these deaths, but even if it’s been a while, you’re clearly still in some turmoil about it all, which would prevent conscious contact with spirits due to a low vibration.

Further, just as some people are more adept at spirit communication, some spirits are too. If the living person or the spirit is highly sensitive and spiritual in nature, contact is far more likely. If both parties are highly sensitive, then amazing things can happen. For example, the first spirit I had lots of contact with was my grandmother. She was a very spiritual sort of person, and we had a deep bond. I believe that because we were very close and because we were both very open and sensitive, it was easy for us to connect.

The more we evolve and the higher our vibration, the greater our power over our own reality and the greater our freedom to travel between spiritual realms, whether we’re on this side or living in another dimension.

In addition to all of the above, we often have dreams of loved ones in Spirit that we don’t remember. Even people who vividly remember their dreams every night may block out visits with loved ones in Spirit if there are unresolved feelings or issues that they’re not ready to face yet. It’s ironic, but the more you heal these relationships and work through your grief, the easier it will be for you to consciously connect.

What I want to emphasize most is the truth that just because you don’t get signs or visits from a particular spirit, that doesn’t mean that the spirit isn’t trying, doesn’t love you, or isn’t okay. I know my dad has tried to get through to my mom, but she just isn’t ready yet. In fact, she admitted that she both wants to hear from him, and is kind of freaked out about the whole idea. This inner conflict explains why she hasn’t had conscious experiences of him since his passing.

As for your father, it sounds to me like two things may be happening here:

First, addicts tend to remain earthbound. It sounds like your dad just hasn’t changed much since he died: he’s still struggling with addiction, and he didn’t instantly become angelic upon crossing over. It even sounds like he may be trying to feed his addiction through you – hence the dream of him chasing you with a needle.

You’re wise to realize that many times when our loved ones cross over, if they have issues that keep them earthbound like alcohol or drug addiction, they will attach to someone and try to continue to drink or get high through them. So someone with a food addiction may latch onto another family member who also has food issues, or at least has a weakness in that area. They don’t intend to harm us, mind you – but just like when they were living, they are too caught up in their own needs to act in a more loving, responsible way.

Until these spirits conquer their addictions, they can’t cross over, for they just keep fixating on the physical pleasures they crave. Whether they want to cross over or not, however, you can release them from your own energy and protect yourself from further attachment. (Research spirit releasement for more information on how to do this.)

This dream of your dad may also simply reflect that you are processing some unresolved feelings and issues you have about your relationship with him. Clearly there is a lot of pain and disappointment left over from this relationship that you have yet to heal, so the dream may not have been a true visit from him but instead be a reflection of your own inner turmoil.

I encourage you to pray for peace and healing for yourself and your father. Visualize him full of light, free from addiction, and surrounded by angels helping him to learn, grow and heal in the afterlife. You can pray for your mother too, and also pray to have the sort of healing experiences you crave with both of your departed parents. If you focus on this and ask for it with a sincere heart, I have faith that you will be guided to peace and fulfillment in the perfect way and time for you.

– Soul Arcanum

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Disconnecting from One Night Stand’s Energy

Filed Under: Energy/Vibration, Healing, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Disconnecting from One Night Stand’s Energy

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum: For a while now, my husband and I have fantasized about having a threesome. Recently that wish came true, though it didn’t go so well. We met a lady from another town and we clicked immediately. I was excited to have a close girlfriend, so right away she came and stayed with us so we could all go on a boating trip together. I promise you that the threesome was entirely her idea. In fact, she was quite aggressive: She went topless on the boat all day and climbed into our bed naked that night. I wasn’t comfortable with this, but my husband was insistent so I went ahead with it. I felt exhausted and horrible afterward. How can I clear this energy and disconnect from her? We made plans to go shopping, but she isn’t returning my phone calls. I feel so disappointed. I don’t want her as a lover, just as a friend, but she has totally dropped us. (I have always wanted to have a really close girlfriend.) Is it possible to clear this energetic connection, or will I forever be tied to her and her lovers? I’m sorry if asking about this makes you uncomfortable; I don’t know who else to turn to.
M.

Dear M.:

The desires that got you into this situation are perfectly normal. Most people want to keep the passion burning in marriage and will try all sorts of different ways to do that. Further, we all have feelings and desires that don’t fit into the neat boxes we’ve been socialized to squeeze into, so we’re constantly longing for something new, more or different.

While your yearning for a close girlfriend is natural, it also could have deep roots beyond the simple desire for a true companion. Perhaps you had a very close friend in a past life and haven’t enjoyed a relationship like that in this one, or you had a romantic relationship with a woman in a past life and part of you vaguely remembers and longs for the pleasure you felt then. (You may have been male or female in that relationship, though odds are you would have been male.)

As I read your question, I saw you in a past life in a very deep, close friendship with another woman. You were both Asian females. You lived in the same house and you were closer to her than you’ve ever been to anyone else. I don’t usually offer this sort of personal information in this forum, but I feel it will help you understand your profound yearning for a close friend.

While you’re wise to remain conscious of things like psychic cords, cutting any cords that were created in this situation is just the first step: to feel better, you’ll need to determine what you really want and go after it in a more effective way. First, however, let’s explore the nature of psychic cords for those who are unfamiliar.

We forge psychic cords to everyone we are close to or interact with on a deep or frequent basis. We thus have psychic cords to our spouses, children, parents and friends, and we have lesser cords to people we interact with on a more casual or infrequent basis. As profound experiences lead to strong cords, and the exchange of bodily fluids also creates potent connections, lovers and mothers/babies tend to have very strong psychic connections.

Psychic cords aren’t bad; in fact, they are the energetic foundation of relationships. In healthy romantic/sexual relationships, the energy flows both ways and is basically balanced. One key aspect of creating a healthy relationship between two adults is clear understanding of what the relationship will entail – a mutual agreement that has both spoken and unspoken rules. Making a commitment is also powerful, so when we get married, we forge a strong psychic bond that endures both because of our commitment and because the rules of the relationship have been so clearly spelled out.

When we jump into bed or into relationships with people we don’t know well, it’s easy to end up in unstable, unhealthy situations. The thing about casual sex is that people are casual about it: There is no commitment and there are no clear agreements made, so these connections tend to be very short-lived.

When we engage in casual sex, we interact in an intense, tangible way, which creates strong psychic cords, but then the whole thing very quickly falls apart. This leaves everyone with their cords hanging, so to speak. Even when there is no overt interaction anymore, if we don’t create closure at the end of a relationship, it’s like leaving a light on when we depart a building: some of our energy is still flowing but we’re not getting any good return for it. In order to have all our energy for other relationships and endeavors, we have to turn off undesired relationships by withdrawing our energy from them.

This will happen on its own in time, which is sort of like that light bulb eventually burning out. However, until you learn whatever you need to learn in order to create the healthy relationships you desire, you’ll tend to keep creating unhealthy cords with new people.

It’s important to get conscious about what you really want so you can find the fulfillment your heart is yearning for. It sounds like you actually had two goals here: to spice up your marriage and to make a deep, true girlfriend. As your approach didn’t work out as you expected, I think you’d be wise to separate these goals. To spice up your marriage, you need to find something that feels good to you on every level. To create a true and lasting bond with a girlfriend, you’d be wise to avoid having casual sex with prospective pals.

Since this woman isn’t returning your interest, you can assume she wasn’t right for you. Now that you know that, you can move on and focus on finding someone who shares your desire for true friendship.

To get closure and directly move on to pursue what you really want, you might perform a ritual to cut cords with this woman. Set aside special time for this purpose, then get quiet, close your eyes, and visualize the cord between you like a string linking you together.

If it feels right, mentally explain to her why you are cutting the cord, or explain to the Universe what you are doing and why. Focus on the positive: on what you want and the good that you expect to come from this. The point is to communicate to yourself and the Universe that you are taking conscious control of creating what you want in your life now.

You may hear something from her or the Universe. These may be impressions, insights, ideas or solutions, so pay attention and allow whatever comes to you to lead you to new awareness and healing. When the time feels right, cut the cord by visualizing yourself with scissors or a knife cutting away whatever connects you. As you do so, say out loud: I cut this cord so that we may both be free to find greater love and happiness. The more you can embody the feeling of love and happiness you desire for yourself and everyone involved, the more powerful the ritual will be.

After you cut the cord, smudge yourself, your husband, your home, your boat and your bed with sage. (Wash all the bedding if you haven’t yet!) Also, get rid of anything this woman gave you and remove all traces of her from your world.

You’ve now created space for new blessings, so read up on the law of attraction and ask the Universe to guide you to the passion and true friendship you desire. Start focusing wholeheartedly on manifesting what you want, and before you know it, you’ll have chalked all of this up to a good learning experience and be absorbed in something new.

– Soul Arcanum

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Empathy and Emotional Control

Filed Under: Emotional Well-being, Healing, Intuitive Development, Psychic Ability, Psychic Protection, Spiritual Growth by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Empathy and Emotional Control

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:
I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder a few years ago, and while I agree with the diagnosis, the label doesn’t quite fit me. I am fairly psychic and more so all the time. I’m clairsentient: I feel too much, care too much (though I don’t think that’s really true!), and I’m always feeling other people’s feelings. Sometimes the energy of others is so strong it can make me go nearly insane. One big facet of borderline personality is an unclear sense of self. I can’t be in a relationship because days into one I’ll have a flip and think, What the hell am I doing? I don’t like this person! and I’ll bail. Some days I see through the eyes of a poorly evolved person; other days I am lost in the glory of Spirit’s sight. It is a true gift but also a curse because I can’t fit into this human world. I don’t expect you to cure me. I know this is my fate. I just want to know if someone like me can find peace between the two worlds I inhabit, or if I will always struggle. Thanks for listening, Soul Arcanum.
Your friend wading through the unseen worlds with her pants hitched up…
Ingrid

Dear Ingrid:

It sounds like you’re a highly sensitive, empathic person. All empaths have an unclear sense of personal boundaries; this is what enables them to feel what other people are feeling.

I recommend you resist being labeled, for you are so much more than BPD or any other abstract idea. Not long ago, you would have been seen to have an impulsive, sensitive, perhaps artistic nature, but no one would have considered you mentally ill. My sense is that you are able to basically function in life, so I would take a spiritual perspective on your struggles instead of accepting a medical diagnosis like this one.

As for whether or not you will always struggle, it’s important to remember that you have the power to create what you want in your life. Much of what you’re dealing with is challenging for all human beings. We are all affected by other people’s emotional energies; some of us are just more affected than others, or are more aware that those vibes are originating outside of us.

Your relationship issues are also pretty normal. They may be a bit more dramatic for you, or perhaps you are extra self-aware and able to observe yourself in relationships and question why you do the things you do. It is important for empaths to realize that sometimes the emotional swings they experience result from shifts between their own feelings and the feelings of others. For example, if someone really likes us and feels good around us, and we tune in to their emotions, we will feel really good around them too. When we later center in our own truth, we may feel very different. So learning how to stay centered in your own emotional truth is key.

As for creating what you want in your life, it sounds to me like you are already on a path to greater spiritual growth and positive change. You are highly sensitive, self-aware, and clearly desirous of a higher level of experience. You know that you want to find a greater sense of peace, and you are manifesting answers and guidance from the Universe, such as this very article. So in my view, there is no need to feel wrong, incomplete or hopeless; things are not so bad, and they’re getting better all the time.

Ultimately, this is a matter of emotional and psychic control. When we get out of balance in terms of development, we experience struggles like those you describe. For example, when someone is centered in their lower chakras, they may work like crazy but without planning or foresight. Someone who is centered in their heads will tend to be overly rational and analytical, and out of touch with their bodies, hearts and spirits.

In your case, you seem to be at the mercy of your own and others’ emotional energy. Since it’s never wise to repress or deny your feelings, in order to create a better sense of balance, you need to bring other aspects of your being up to speed.

On a physical level, this may mean getting more grounded, strong and healthy. Since you also need to learn how to control emotional energy (your own as well as the psychic energy of others), training in a martial art like Chi Gong may prove very helpful. This will also strengthen your aura, which is your natural defense against outside psychic influences. Yoga would also help you get centered energetically and give you a way to find a calm center within whenever you start to feel frazzled or overwhelmed.

On a mental level, meditation should prove perfect for you, since you need to find a way to get calm and gain control of your emotions. By strengthening your mind, you will learn to control your impulses and also become more aware of what is yours energetically versus what is coming from other people.

On a spiritual level, I recommend learning how to control your psychic sensitivity, and developing greater faith. To control your sensitivity, you must get centered within yourself. When a sensitive person lacks a strong sense of self-awareness and self-control, they’re like a tree without a deep, strong root system: with the slightest breeze they can be blown right over. If you get grounded and centered in your own truth, self-awareness and sense of well-being, you’ll develop personal strength from within. Then no matter how the wind may blow around you, nothing will topple you.

This is all about learning how to set your own tone. This means you decide how you want to feel and you consciously cultivate that vibration from within. Basically, you are deciding who you want to be and how you want to feel, and you are consciously generating that vibration and radiating it outward instead of soaking up the energies all around you.

You can still be sensitive and helpful to others if you do this; in fact, you can be far more helpful. For example, to save someone who is drowning, you don’t want to dive into the water and start drowning yourself; you want to remain stable on the shore, throw them a lifeline, and then pull them in. When you are rooted in a high vibration, you can lift those who are struggling up to a higher state of being.

Faith is absolutely essential, for when you have faith that all is well and everything happens for a good reason, you can remain centered in your higher self even when others are going down. When your faith is sound, you can feel compassion for others without having to literally feel their pain. Some people think they are better healers or counselors if they are empathic, but I disagree: two people in pain is NOT better than one. It’s better to have one person in pain and a caring person who is feeling great who can lift the one who is hurting to higher ground.

Finally, despite what many people may tell you, I encourage you to let go of the idea that you need to be protected from other people’s energy. I know that because you are sensitive, you often feel overwhelmed, but that’s mainly because you resist intense energies out of fear. You’ve been overwhelmed for a long time, and you’ve survived just fine. Instead of trying to protect yourself from intense, dramatic or unsettling energies, RELAX. Trust that everything is and will be fine. Send love to everything and everyone. This will reverse the flow of energy, so instead of being bombarded by others’ feelings, you will radiate your own vibration outward. Divine love will then flow through you, which will make you feel wonderful and may help others in many ways as well.

– Soul Arcanum

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A Spiritual Perspective on Codependency

Filed Under: Destiny/Higher Plan, Emotional Well-being, Healing, Relationships by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on A Spiritual Perspective on Codependency

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:
Could you please explain what codependency is? What fears lie behind it, and what healing tools could be used to heal it? Thank you for the wonderful job you do with Soul Arcanum – your words bring more light into my life!
Ellen

Dear Ellen:

Codependency ultimately arises from a lack of faith in a higher plan and power. If we believe that we won’t be okay unless we remain vigilantly in control, and that others won’t be okay unless we personally guide and rescue them, then we will go to insane lengths to try to make things go the way we think they should go.

Codependency is of course also a relationship issue involving a lack of clear personal boundaries. Basically, codependents misdirect their efforts by taking responsibility for others’ choices. Further, everyone has fears of abandonment/being alone. Some people avoid the potential pain of being rejected by avoiding getting too close or attached, while others (codependents) try to prevent the potential hurt of being lonely by clinging on tight, avoiding the truth, and smoothing things over. They literally lose themselves in relationships.

Codependency always involves an addict – otherwise we’d just call it obsession. In this scenario, the addict may addicted to alcohol, drugs, gambling, food, attention, drama, or even just being lazy and irresponsible, while the codependent is addicted to the addict. All addicts feel they can’t live without whatever (or whomever) they’re addicted to, and this is what motivates their desperate, self-destructive, crazy behavior. In the dependent/codependent relationship, neither person is centered in their own personal power; both are looking for God or emotional sustenance in something/someone outside of themselves instead of within.

I believe that we all have addictive and codependent tendencies, for we all have fears of being vulnerable, alone, helpless, unloved, abandoned, unhappy, unfulfilled, etc. Further, even seemingly emotionally healthy people have buried issues that can lie dormant for years and then be reawakened by any number of triggers.

For example, we may meet someone from a past life with whom we have dependent/codependent karmic patterns, or connect with someone new who pushes one of our buttons. When this happens, we tend to feel a strong sense of connection or attraction to that person, and may mistakenly assume that this means we’ve met the soul mate we’ve been praying for and will live happily ever after with them. Instead, our inner beings feel drawn to these people because they can help us heal something deep within us that needs healing.

This is what happens when children of alcoholics grow up and marry other addicts. Even when they carefully screen out overt alcoholics, to their dismay, many find themselves repeating familiar old patterns. If Sandy was forever covering for dad when she was a girl, she may marry a man who constantly needs rescuing in some way in order to learn that this sort of behavior isn’t truly loving or respectful of either one of them. If Mom was affectionate and cheerful when drugged up but mean and withdrawn when sober, Bill may be strangely attracted to women who run hot and cold in order to heal the emotional wounds he suffered as a child.

The possibilities are endless: the point is that what attracts us to other people on an unconscious, spiritual level is always meaningful and purposeful. While we are drawn to certain people because they may have the traits we consciously desire in a partner, there are other, deeper forces at work as well.

I did my own wretched tour of codependent duty when I was a freshman in college. As I had grown up with an obese, food-addicted father, I was well-trained in codependency myself. When I met Dan, there was an instant feeling of soul recognition, and yet my heart didn’t swell with love and delight. Instead, it was like I’d just come across a live wire on the ground that was sending out fiery sparks: I felt enthralled but wary.

Dan was brilliant, fascinating, sexy, self-possessed, and a mean, ugly drunk. When he was sober, life with him was heaven; when he was drinking, it was hell. He loved me beautifully two thirds of the time, and the other third he treated me like dirt. This was profoundly heart-wrenching and confusing, but because I was so attached to the ecstasy, I kept hanging on through the miserable times with him. Nothing was more important to me than him loving me completely, so I accepted his addiction as an excuse for his totally unacceptable behavior. Instead of telling him what I really thought and felt, I tried to smooth things over and keep them going. Instead of drawing a firm line with him, I let him emotionally use and abuse me.

I know that many people reading this can relate. For those who haven’t been through something similar, imagine a pimp getting you hooked on crack by giving you a little taste and then disappearing…showing up suddenly with another little bit of heaven, getting you high, beating the crap out of you, and then taking off again…returning with sweet apologies and lots of what you want but then suddenly claiming a supply shortage and jacking his prices sky high. If you want it, you can have it, but you’ll have to sell yourself to get it. Since you feel like you’re dying without it, you’re willing to give up anything – your health, your self-respect, your very soul – just to stop the pain.

This is what happens when codependents get hooked on addicts. By nature, addicts are not emotionally honest with themselves or anyone else, which generates seemingly crazy, irrational behavior. When we remember that codependents are also addicts, it’s easy to see how confusion reins and endless crazy swings between hope and despair become normal.

In terms of spiritual development, codependents tend to ignore both reason and their intuition. They will continue with this as long as their fear of being alone or unloved is greater than their fear of being used, abused and in a miserable relationship. Eventually, however, the pain and frustration grow intolerable and they begin to reason their way out of the mess they find themselves in.

My head kept trying to tell me that what I was doing with Dan didn’t make sense and wasn’t leading where I really wanted to go, but I believed I couldn’t live without him. Eventually, reason convinced me that if I really wanted to feel loved and happy, I was going about it all wrong. How could anyone truly love and respect me when I was unable to respect myself enough to stop the insanity?

Of course, by enabling their addict, most codependents believe that they are acting in a loving manner. Once they realize that enabling addicts is more hurtful than helpful of everyone involved, they naturally begin to change.

Finally, at the heart of the journey of healing from codependency is the development of faith in something bigger than ourselves. When we have faith that everything happens for a good reason and everyone is doing whatever they need to do in order to learn what they need to learn, it’s easy to give up trying to save or control them. Others are already doing whatever they need to be doing, and they can only save themselves anyway. This goes for us too, of course: we realize that instead of wasting our time and energy trying to force square pegs into round holes, we would be wise to focus on fulfilling our own goals and dreams with trust that if we align with what we want within, whatever happens in our outer experience will prove to be for the best.

– Soul Arcanum

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Karmic Consequences of Energy Healing

Filed Under: Energy/Vibration, Healing, Karma by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Karmic Consequences of Energy Healing

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:
I’ve heard that it’s possible for the healer to get sick instead of those she is working on getting better, which really confuses me. If our intention is to help others, then shouldn’t we be karmically blessed by doing so? In general, how do you think energy healing works?
Brenda

Dear Brenda:

You are right that what we wish for others, we attract to ourselves, which means that in trying to heal others, we end up healing ourselves. On the surface, it may seem like we are contracting others’ problems, but in truth, we’re making new progress by uncovering something we personally need to learn, master, release or transform.

I often compare a conscious spiritual journey to putting our homes in order. Whenever we repress or deny some energy or issue, we figuratively sweep it under the rug. Once there it remains a problem or issue, but it’s no longer where we have to look at it every day. Then we must try to function without tripping or stumbling over it. Most of the time we achieve this by limiting our range of potential and experience: we avoid that area because we usually experience pain or problems when we go that way.

Consciously opening up to healing is like finding the will and courage to lift up that corner of the rug to see what’s under there, then pulling it out and releasing it or dealing with it in whatever way feels appropriate. After that, we can enjoy more of our potential because we don’t have to avoid that area anymore, and things generally go a bit more smoothly for us.

Human beings have a tremendous capacity for avoidance, repression and denial, so when we discover some new mess under the rug, our first reaction is usually to feel like we’ve been struck with a new problem or stroke of bad luck. From a higher perspective, however, discovering this mess is progressive because now we can consciously face and clean up something that has been tripping us up or limiting our potential.

As for how healing works, trust and faith play enormous roles here. First we must trust in the healing process itself and let go of our need to intellectually understand every nuance of it. The so-called issues we uncover and work through are many-layered and deeply complex, so we may never completely understand on a conscious level why we manifested everything we did or had to go through a particular experience. We must simply trust that everything happens for a good reason and do our best to consciously work through the inner and outer experiences that come up.

Even when there is nothing in particular ready to be healed right now, if on some level we are afraid that in trying to help others they may drag us down, we’ll fear or expect problems, and thus tend to manifest them. By contrast, when we’re centered in faith and trust and are consciously on top of our own issues (when our houses are in order and there is nothing hiding under our rugs), we can just relax, flow good vibes and enjoy wonderful results.

However, we can’t be attached to those wonderful results. This is where faith comes in: The more we are concerned about someone or whether or not we will be able to help them, the more ego is involved. By contrast, the greater our faith that all is well and the more faith we have in healing in general, the easier it is to do our best and at the same time surrender the results to a higher power.

It’s also important to realize that we can’t heal anyone. We can love, help, teach and support others, but ultimately, all healing is self-healing, just like all learning is self-learning. (We can teach others, but that doesn’t mean they will absorb what we have to offer because we can’t learn it for them.)

We’ve been raised in a world that tends to view doctors and healers as the ones doing the work, and as a result, it can be very easy to slip into this sort of thinking. As soon as we do this, however, we disconnect from the higher source we’re trying to tap into. Then instead of allowing healing to flow through us, we begin to try to will others to heal with our own energy. This is draining and can bring both parties down instead of lifting the one who needs help up.

Perhaps the biggest mistake I see healers making is focusing on healing as opposed to health. There are many who teach healers to look for problems and visualize them getting better in some way. In fact, I was taught this approach myself by a number of wonderful healers, but Spirit set me straight: if we focus on healing, we’ll keep healing, while if we focus on being healthy, then that is what we’ll become.

It sounds backwards, but empathy and compassion can actually be downfalls here. Instead of feeling bad for those who need healing, we must simply love them as perfect and stay in a high vibration no matter what. This is like manifesting anything else: instead of viewing a problem to be solved or healed, you have to hold a vision of what is wanted instead.

When I engage in energy healing work, I always ask Spirit to show me a vision of the person I’m working with in a perfect, radiant state of health and happiness. I ask to be shown their divine beauty, and then I simply admire them with a sense of wonder and appreciation, and I ask Spirit to send through my heart whatever energy they may need in order to reconnect with that radiant feeling themselves.

This is an intuitive or channeled process. While I�m sending this healing energy, I feel like every cell in my body is glowing with divine light. I can feel divine light on my face, flowing through me, illuminating all of my being. I feel sort of in love with whoever I’m working on, for I see nothing but beauty and perfection in them.

While I believe anyone can learn how to flow healing energy, those who are especially gifted at it are able to get into a very high vibration and hold a purely loving intention without losing it. This requires more psychic energy than you might think, for you have to leave the endless thoughts and feelings of the ego completely behind. It feels a bit like balancing on a high wire on the inside, for it requires complete focus on all levels of your being, but at the same time, a relaxed sense of trust and confidence.

On the other end of things, receiving healing is basically being reminded of how it feels to be in a state of perfect peace and well-being. For those who have never felt that wonderful before, it can be a revelation to experience feeling more blessed out and peaceful than you ever imagined was possible.

Of course, how long you maintain that higher state if up to you. Most people can only hold that soaring vibration for a little while before something happens that returns them to their habitual level of thought, and they lose it.

This doesn’t mean that energy healing is a waste of time – far from it! The more we are guided into any state of being, the easier it is for us to find our own way there. Healing itself can be powerful, but training the mind to find and maintain a very high state is even more so. This is why I developed Deep Trance Healing Therapy, which utilizes daily meditations as training sessions for your inner being. By regularly shifting into the feeling state of health, joy, peace and abundance we desire in our imagination, that state becomes more and more familiar, and when our everyday vibration changes, our outer world is naturally transformed.

– Soul Arcanum

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Crossing Over an Old Imaginary Friend

Filed Under: Afterlife, Healing, Spirit Communication, Spirits by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Crossing Over an Old Imaginary Friend

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
 

Dear Soul Arcanum:
I have a spirit friend who has followed me since I was a toddler. (My mother recalls me talking to her as an imaginary friend even before I do.) Though I don’t live in the house I grew up in, she now lives in my basement, and her name is Alyssa. Recently I decided to learn how to consciously communicate with her again, and now I can talk to her freely. She’s told me that she’s 11 years old and was killed by her abusive father. Her father’s ghost comes around sometimes too, though he’s not here as often as Alyssa. She tells me that he abused her throughout her life. I’ve seen him many times: he’s tall and muscular, looks dirty like a laborer, and is a smoker and an alcoholic. His eyes are filled with hate and sorrow. Sometimes I believe he’s mad at himself, but most of the time I feel he wants to hurt someone. Alyssa is very sweet and would never hurt me, but she hasn’t forgiven her father. Every time I go down into the basement, I feel she stands nearby to protect me from her father, who stares angrily at her while I’m there. When she is watching over me, he just glares at her but never moves an inch. Once she wasn’t there, however, and he crept toward me until I raced out of the basement. I want to help both of these ghosts cross over but I don’t know how. What should I do?
Laura

Dear Laura:

I must admit that this is not my specialty. While I have perceived earthbound spirits in the past, I am much more adept at communicating with spirits who have crossed over. I believe this is the result of a natural progression. When our psychic ability is first awakening, we tend to be pretty freaked out, and our fear aligns us with subtle energies of a lower nature.

Earthbound spirits have a heavier vibration than your average person. Even when they’re earthbound simply because they’re lost, they’re still deeply lonely and confused, so they’re not in a good space. Spirits who have crossed over have a higher vibration than your average person, so it takes someone who can get into a very high state of consciousness to communicate with them.

As we grow in faith and wisdom, our vibration naturally rises, so we tend to shift from psychically connecting with earthbound spirits to perceiving departed spirits in heaven, to ultimately channeling guides and angels. So where people are on this spectrum determines their psychic forte.

While I may not be the ideal person to help you at this time, I have been that person in the past, and I can tell you a few things about this situation that should help.

First, you are right to want to cross these ghosts over. As you can see, they are stuck beyond time and space; they’re interminably on hold. Given the appearance of the father, I’m betting he died shortly after killing his daughter. (Perhaps he committed suicide or got the death penalty for her murder.) In any case, neither of these beings were at peace in life, and thus they aren’t at peace in death.

As for your own needs, having earthbound spirits attached to you (even sweet little girl spirits) can have a negative affect on your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual well-being. To sustain themselves, earthbound spirits must draw upon our emotional energy, so even if Alyssa doesn’t mean you one bit of harm, she is a drain on you.

No doubt when you were a toddler, you were cute and seemed safe when Alyssa was looking for a happy family to join after she died. She had nowhere else to go, so she befriended you and hung out at your house. I’m sure it helped that you were able to perceive and play with her.

I bet her father is attached to her, and she is attached to you. He is clearly wrestling with his own demons, trying to overcome his lower nature. He may have resisted going into the Light when he died because he was afraid he would be punished for what he’d done, or he may have simply been trying to hold onto his daughter so he could continue to use her.

Many times murder victims will become earthbound because they want someone to know what happened to them and to see their murderers brought to justice. It’s my understanding that there is a window between a few days and about a week after death during which the Light is ever standing by, ready for us to cross over. If we linger too long before crossing over, that energy fades away, and we end up stuck between dimensions. This is why murder victims often become earthbound.

As for how you can help these two cross over, first you must convince them that this is in their best interests. You might assure Alyssa that once she has crossed into the Light, she’ll find other loved ones who have crossed before her. Further, since her father is clearly attached to her here, by crossing over she can set herself free from him.

As for him, you may have to talk to him about divine forgiveness and the need for him to forgive himself and seek redemption. If this doesn’t work, he may be willing to go simply because Alyssa is going. (You may have to get creative to convince him to move on.)

I would pray my heart out to generate lots of love and compassion for them both and bathe them with that energy. Send him as much love and compassion as you can muster, for though he may be angry and violent, he is clearly a tortured spirit. This will help him to reconnect with his own inner divinity, which will help him align with crossing over. It will also spiritually protect you, for as I always say, the best way to protect yourself from dark shadows is to simply turn up your inner light.

Having said that, it’s important that you don’t feel stressed about crossing them over. While it’s wise and kind to do what you can, they have free will. If they refuse to cross over, it would be best for you to set yourself free from this spirit attachment. That is a big additional subject that I don’t have room to go into here, and which I have covered extensively in other articles.

Once these two have agreed to cross over, you might simply pray for assistance from their guides and angels as well as your own. There are beings ever ready to assist us with this sort of thing, but first we must look for the Light. Getting stuck between dimensions is much like getting mired in any problem here in the physical. For example, an addict can be down and out and feel like there is nothing he can do to break free, but once he decides to change and asks for help, he discovers that there has always been help available to him. So pray with all your heart for guides and angels to come and escort these two over, and tell the spirits to look for these kind helpers.

If this doesn’t work, you could try to simply take them to the portal they need to cross through. An obvious choice would be a funeral, for there will be an open portal there, ready for the recently departed. Tell Alyssa to get her father and come with you. Once there, simply tell her to look for the Light and to take her father with her through it.

If all the above fails, you can always call someone who specializes in this sort of thing. Since you can consciously communicate with her, however, I’m confident you can affect this on your own. Heck, you may even have the makings of an earthbound spirit specialist yourself!

– Soul Arcanum

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Psychic Vampire Wants a Healthier Way to Get Energy

Filed Under: Emotional Well-being, Energy/Vibration, Healing, Psychic Protection by Soul Arcanum — Comments Off on Psychic Vampire Wants a Healthier Way to Get Energy

Copyright Soul Arcanum LLC. All rights reserved. :)
Dear Soul Arcanum:

A psychic told me that my aura is black. I thought this meant I was evil and bad. I am constantly attempting to connect with the world around me, for I feel disconnected and far away. I am ever trying to connect spiritually and emotionally with others through physical contact, especially lovemaking. I feel a strong need for the connection between mother and child, and I want to take care of something helpless so that it will need me. I grew up in an alcoholic home with no one to help me or reach out and hold me. I am depressed and very negative and pessimistic. This is my shield; I have to be this way in my current situation. I want to be a spiritual person, but I don’t feel like I fit in. I feel all alone. Others often mirror my moods and emotions, and I try to get near happy, peaceful people so that I can be more like them. Is this psychic vampirism? I went through a phase of cutting and vampirism in my adolescent years, and used the exchange of blood as a sexual way of getting close to people. It made me feel energized. I want to feel connected. I often feel threatened by negative energies in my home, and I think they are created by my negative moods. Can you give me advice? – Shirley

Dear Shirley:

As you are extraordinarily self-aware, I predict you’re on the verge of a major spiritual breakthrough. Before I go into your question on psychic vampirism, I urge you to examine your belief that you have to be depressed and pessimistic in order to protect yourself. Since like attracts like, true psychic protection involves turning up our inner light and focusing with faith and joy on what we desire – but that is another column.

For those who don’t know, psychic vampires are people who lack a clear, strong connection to Source, and in order to get their basic energy needs met, they try to feed on the life force energy of others. There are some fascinating scientific studies of the human energy field that demonstrate via aura photography that our auras are indeed influenced by the auras of other people. These studies have shown that in relationships where people feel good when they’re together, each individual’s aura becomes bigger and brighter while in the presence of the other person. By contrast, in negative interactions or relationships, auras constrict and grow dimmer. This corresponds with feelings of fatigue and negative emotions in the participants.

Other studies have even demonstrated that some individuals are very skilled at purposefully tapping into and feeding off of other people’s auras. Researchers can actually watch as the psychic vampire’s aura grows stronger and brighter while the victim’s aura grows dimmer.

Here are some questions you might ask yourself if you want to know if you’re a psychic vampire:

Do you generally feel better when you’re with other people as opposed to alone? Do you crave attention and love to be in the spotlight? Do others often interrupt you or abruptly end conversations with you? Do you take a very long time to explain what you want to say? Do you often complain about physical ailments or mundane problems? Are you more of a talker than a listener? Do you lean on others for help with basic life necessities, or frequently ask for favors or advice? Are you constantly disappointed in other people or situations because they don’t fulfill all your needs and desires?

If you answered yes to many of the questions above, odds are good that you are trying to get some of your life force energy needs met by trying to grab and hold other people’s attention.

The fact that you grew up in an alcoholic household fits the picture as well. Most psychic vampires have at least one parent who was also a psychic vampire. Since children have much stronger needs for care and energy than adults, when they are leaned on heavily by a parent or grow up in dysfunctional households, they may never get a chance to develop a healthy energy system. It may also be that you simply learned to seek energy in other people from your parents – that they leaned on others for energy so you learned that this is normal.

It’s well known that the children of alcoholics often become codependent. Please research this and get some therapy to resolve these core issues. What you really need is not another person to need you, but rather to heal some deep abandonment wounds from the past, and learn how to love and respect yourself the way you long to be loved and respected by others. I highly recommend hypnotherapy to address the limiting subconscious beliefs you picked up in childhood (and perhaps in past lives), and to heal your depression and cultivate well-being from within.

Since you mentioned negative energies in your home, it’s important to note that sometimes people become psychic vampires to compensate for their own energy being drained by another person or an astral entity. Unresolved issues from the past (including past lives) can also be very draining, so I again recommend hypnotherapy or energy healing work to check out those possibilities.

In any case, you can break this cycle by developing the healthy connection to Source that you never got a chance to develop as a child. If you tap into the Divine, you’ll find an infinite supply of energy available to you; by contrast, trying to meet our energy needs through other people is exhausting in and of itself, and never truly satisfying.

First you must make a firm decision that you will no longer continue in this pattern. Instead, you’ll receive all the energy you need in healthy ways: from the earth, the air you breathe, the food you eat, and Divine Source. Affirm that your supply is infinite, and that all you have to do is open to the Divine to feel recharged and renewed.

In addition to taking good care of yourself by getting enough sleep, exercise, healthy food and restful sleep, I highly recommend you take up something like yoga or tai chi to get the energy flowing freely through your system, and also meditate to connect to Source energy.

To begin to draw all the energy you need through daily spiritual practice, I recommend you work with my Chakra Clearing and Charging Meditation. At the end of that meditation, your root chakra will be open, charged and clear. Visualize red energy flowing up from the earth into your root chakra as well as into the soles of your feet. Feel the earth energy charging your whole being with power, health, strength, vitality and well-being. Feel this energy swirling throughout your whole being, and going wherever it needs to go and becoming whatever it needs to become to keep you feeling strong, healthy, and centered in your personal power.

Next focus on your crown chakra and visualize white light pouring into your crown from Source. See it flowing through all of your being, filling you with peace, well-being, energy and vitality. See it swirling throughout your being, going wherever you need it to go in order to feel calm, peaceful and centered. Notice how it is crystalline and opalescent: it shines with all the colors of the rainbow, so as it flows throughout your being, it can become whatever you need it to be.

If you practice this meditation every morning and whenever you feel drained, tired, or in need of more energy, and you also follow up on my other suggestions, I have faith that very soon, you’ll feel like a brand new person.

– Soul Arcanum

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