Dear Soul Arcanum:
This may sound silly, but I assure you that I’m very sincere in asking this question. I believe in the spirit world, and that we are surrounded by guardians, departed family members and so on. Because of this, there are times I feel uncomfortable. Can spirits see us using the bathroom or having sex? How does that work? I feel ashamed when I think of my parents or grandparents possibly watching me do these things. Thank you for your time!
– Karen
Dear Karen:
I used to wonder the same thing! Thank you for having the courage to ask this question.
Let me reassure you: it is highly unlikely that your departed loved ones are any more aware of your private activities now than they were when they were alive. For the most part, whatever would have been true of your loved ones while living will be true of them on the other side. I apologize for this freaky example, but if your father would not have “peeked in” on you having sex when he was alive, he won’t do that after crossing over either.
People who were unethical or lacking in moral character in life, however, may continue along the same veins in the afterlife. We generally refer to spirits of a very low vibration as “earthbound.” Hopefully, most of our loved ones don’t fall into this category, and they move on to higher realms when they cross over.
Also, whatever is emotionally important to an entity will guide it in the astral. If it is important for your father to get a message to you that he is okay, he will be drawn to do that. Unless it is emotionally important to someone in the astral to “see you” having sex or doing something else you’d like to keep private, it won’t happen. This means that just as in life, the only ones who may be “spying on us” are what we might call perverts.
Given all of this, while it is possible for someone in the astral to intrude on our private moments, it is not something that people we trust would do, for it is just as unethical on the other side as it is here.
Furthermore, when we leave behind the physical, we also leave behind our physical senses, so the nature of our perceptions changes. In the dimensions beyond this plane, our appearance is malleable – only the quality of our energy shines through.
For example, when we are caught up in fear or darkness, our auras appear shadowy. When we are full of love and light, our energy shines. Whatever is going on inside of us will suffuse our aura with certain qualities, but that doesn’t mean our specific actions or thoughts can be seen or read. Just as you might look at a person and think they look “sad” but not know why, in the astral, beings can sense the essence of our energy but not know what we’re thinking or doing to feel that way.
When spirits perceive us, they don’t see our physical bodies. Anything that is purely physical in nature is “beyond them.” So if we think of them with love while we’re washing the dishes, they will be called to the energy of our love, and probably have no idea what our physical hands are doing while we’re reminiscing about them. In the most unlikely event that they happened to visit us when we were having sex, they may perceive us in union with our lover’s energy, but it would be hard for them to distinguish if this was because we were making love or because we were expressing our affection via soulful communication or some other activity.
Lust, however, is another matter, because it shows up differently in our auras. If we have debased thoughts of some kind, the quality of that energy is easy to distinguish from higher forms of desire. Remember, it’s the QUALITY of our energy that is perceived, not the details of our thoughts. On the other hand, if we’re having debased thoughts, the only way our loved ones in Spirit would know it is if they were a vibrational match to it. When we’re caught up in some “lower” thinking, we’re too low for higher level spirits to enter our energetic orbit; only spirits that are a match to that vibration will head our way. This is why the best way to connect with loved ones in Spirit is to raise our vibration by thinking of them with great love and joy.
It also explains why it’s so important for us to purify our hearts and minds, for if we are lusting after alcohol, we’ll attract the earthbound spirits of former alcoholics. If we’re having some perverse sexual fantasy, we’ll attract the earthbound spirits of former perverts or sex addicts. If that’s not what we want in terms of metaphysical influence, then we have to choose higher thoughts. Similarly, if we focus on higher spiritual principles like wisdom, compassion, healing, etc., we will attract high spiritual teachers from the other side.
Now I’d like to address the deeper issue in your questions, and that is your sense of shame about basic biological functions. I feel the time you spend worrying about whether anyone in Spirit can see you doing things you find embarrassing may be better spent pondering why you feel ashamed in the first place. I assure you that there is no spiritual reason for your shame; it’s entirely a product of social conditioning.
In fact, shame about natural functions is a relatively new human invention, and though this truth may surprise you, it is not universal in nature. There are many parts of the world, for example, where people go to the bathroom in full view of others. Our shame about biological functions stems from the Puritan perspective that the physical world is inferior to “heavenly” realms, and thus physical desires and impulses must be “risen above” if we want to be rewarded when we leave this life.
So long as we remain in conscious control of our choices, this notion is total rubbish. This deep-seated shame is one of the many disservices the Christian religion has done to humankind. In truth, the human body is a miracle of divine perfection!
There is no natural function or endeavor that is inherently immoral. Sex above all is a beautiful reflection of divine creativity. It is the holy power of sex to create life that fuels humankind’s fearful obsession with controlling it. Far from being something to be ashamed of, it is a facet of the sacred force that created and continues to sustain life.
Sex was devised by a much wiser, higher intelligence than the society that has taught you that it is unseemly. Why would “God” have created us as we are if it was inherently bad to be this way? Since we are created in “God’s” image, it seems to me that when we’re ashamed of natural functions, we are essentially ashamed of God.
So you can rest easy knowing that only your higher spiritual thoughts and acts will be perceptible on the higher spiritual planes of the heavens. Further, it’s my understanding that the higher one goes in Spirit, the broader one’s perspective becomes, so even the things we feel misplaced shame about would not be considered shameful to heavenly spirits. To sum up your answer in one sentence, when it comes to your loved ones in Spirit “catching you in the act,” you have nothing to worry about, my dear!
– Soul Arcanum
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